tom9686

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tom9686

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 February 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1567
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About tom9686 : go to gym play basketball and laugh at people

tom9686's page activity

Visits<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 11/18/2015 at 2:40am<b>Pike313</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 11:17pm<b>EpicMamo</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 6:38pm<b>madi37</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 12:49am<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 3:36pm<b>amy397123</b> - the 12/21/2009 at 1:59am

tom9686's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

tom9686's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss told me that if I didn't become his neighbor on Farmville I wouldn't have a job. I laughed. He didn't. FML

by Anon / 02/27/2010 at 11:07am / United States / Work

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2010 at 10:29am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my step-mom yelled at me for an hour, calling me a slut because our male dog saw me naked. FML

Today, a drunk man opened the unlocked door to my house thinking it was his house. He tried to attack me because he thought I was a burglar. FML

by jerrid / 02/21/2010 at 1:05pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at the supermarket, I ignored the "Riding on trolleys down the ramp is strictly prohibited" sign. While going full speed down the ramp, my trolley with $200 worth of groceries in it tipped and crashed. Luckily, I broke its fall. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2010 at 6:58am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went skiing. Trying to show off to some inexperienced skiers, I flew past them at my top speed, a bracket snapped off my boot and I slid on my face for about 30 metres. FML

by hoser / 02/21/2010 at 5:01am / Canada (Alberta) / Holidays

Today, my friends told me, "Don't worry about your bad acne. It kind of looks like the pattern the avatars have on their heads." FML

by Anonymous / 02/19/2010 at 3:27pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML

by somuchforthat / 02/19/2010 at 2:38am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML

by GeneralElement / 02/19/2010 at 1:32am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, I grounded my daughter for putting play doh in the toaster. She's 17 and got into Columbia early admissions. FML

by grrrrrr / 02/19/2010 at 1:18am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realised I know the map on World of Warcraft better than the map of my own country. FML

by DLS / 02/18/2010 at 1:05pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous

Today, like all days, my cat brought something to my doorstep. Usually it's a slew of dead mice; but today he decided to bring this big, ugly snake. I'm always the only one in my family 'brave' enough to go fetch our cat's gift. It took until lifting it up to realize the snake wasn't dead. FML

by Mary / 02/15/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (Delaware) / Animals

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML

by ShayisPay101 / 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

by Dog fart / 02/13/2010 at 11:08am / United States / Animals

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

by Dog fart / 02/13/2010 at 11:08am / United States / Animals