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timtamslam

Offline (the 12/04/2014 at 5:45am) | Search for a member

timtamslam

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2509
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About timtamslam : .

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timtamslam's favorite FMLs

Today, I wandered around my property with my children, trying to find our escaped house cat. While in the more wooded parts, we spotted her on the ground, being picked over by a coyote. FML

#18795812
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37211) - you deserved it (2908)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:57pm - animals - by Jeslyn03 - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, a guy tried to seduce me by talking about incest. FML

#18586179
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30835) - you deserved it (3199)

On 12/23/2011 at 2:42am - intimacy - by balkangirl94 - United States (Florida)

Today, my separation anxiety got so intense, I found myself smelling my boyfriend's pillow. FML

#18566755
149 comments

Today, a Karate dojo opened under my apartment. It's like living in a Bruce Lee movie. FML

#18516583
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23005) - you deserved it (2879)

On 12/15/2011 at 12:09am - misc - by rattlingfloorboards (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68574) - you deserved it (3355)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, like every day since my birth, my name is Spreme. Yeah, you probably have trouble pronouncing it correctly too. FML

#18227248
468 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41168) - you deserved it (3193) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 11/12/2011 at 10:42am - misc - by Nico - France

Today, I was at work when I found an iPhone on the floor. I decided not to turn it into the manager and keep it. Five minutes later, a customer asked if anyone had turned in her missing phone. I said no and began to walk away, when her friend called her phone. It rang. She recognized the ringtone. FML

#18086269
526 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10103) - you deserved it (184982)

On 10/27/2011 at 1:01am - work - by charlie3289 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

#17977094
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64332) - you deserved it (3206)

On 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm - love - by Good sister (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mom found a new way to get me to clean my room. She piled everything from my floor in front of my wardrobe and padlocked my dresser shut. The best part? She put the key in my room. The worst part? She put over a hundred decoys in there too. FML

#17880889
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10377) - you deserved it (34422)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:45pm - misc - by Kazuya - Australia (Victoria)

Today, it was my first day as a police officer. A couple of hours into the shift, we got a call. A man was drunkenly jeering and urinating on parked cars. That man turned out to be my father. FML

#17787359
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37890) - you deserved it (2877)

On 09/20/2011 at 10:56am - work - by PC Jones (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend gave me a gift. A half-used bottle of body lotion that belonged to his dead wife. FML

#17741306
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31623) - you deserved it (2950)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:12am - love - by ppp - United States

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

#17695095
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8091) - you deserved it (61779)

On 09/08/2011 at 6:00am - health - by Stuck (man) - United States

Today, I was doing my jazz aerobics workout and accidentally kicked my 3 year old daughter in the face. Everyone we know, including my wife, thinks I beat her. FML

#17613922
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28992) - you deserved it (8838)

On 08/29/2011 at 5:19pm - health - by Stan - United States (California)

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

#17538600
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27744) - you deserved it (5500)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States

Today, I woke up with a foul stench forcing its way up my nostrils. It turns out our septic tank broke, and is now leaking into our backyard, and sadly, our basement. I live in the basement. FML

#17460789
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26278) - you deserved it (2345)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:04pm - misc - by thatguythere858 (man) - United States (Kansas)



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