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timtamslam

Offline (the 12/04/2014 at 5:45am) | Search for a member

timtamslam

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2708
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About timtamslam : .

timtamslam's page activity

Visits<b>constipation</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 1:54pm<b>cooper3991</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 3:17pm<b>rabidbunniez</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 11:10pm<b>Plastinate</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Jaager</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 7:51pm<b>jalenlounis</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:58pm<b>wildsweetchild</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:20am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:40am<b>FuhrerBurg</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 12:05am<b>windell</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 11:37pm<b>thisguy184</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 3:33am<b>BrittanyHen</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 12:39pm<b>Smorg_z16</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 10:35pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 7:19pm<b>Blue_Black</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 12:56am<b>rob02</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 1:58am<b>mLove395</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 4:52pm<b>Catkam623</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 12:27pm

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timtamslam's favorite FMLs

Today, after careful consideration, I told ma wife I really want to ave kids . Se lauged, until se finally realized I was serious, at wic point se flicked me in te balls and said, "Problem solved." FML

#19818500
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25640) - you deserved it (3316)

On 06/20/2012 at 12:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Taday I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, ( No, but they do, asshole, ) and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

#19781749
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8442) - you deserved it (105498)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm - money - by ouch - United States (Florida)

yesterday during the early hours.. . I got hungry an went to grab something to eat . I entered the kitchen.. . only to see mah stark-naked dad sitting at the table.. . eating cereal an reading the paper . He just nodded at me an said.. . "Son." I think I need a new pair of eyes . FML

#19751282
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21520) - you deserved it (2120)

On 06/07/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Rohirus (man) - Sweden

Today... In A Rush To Get Mah Clothe Back On At Mah Grlfriend's House At The Sound Of Her Parent Opening The Front Door... I Forgot To Take The Condom Off. Her Dad Watchd It Fall Out Of Mah Pant Leg And Onto The Kitchen Floor. FML

#19710621
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19115) - you deserved it (39707)

On 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today , grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly , she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing , she said , "Oh , am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25974) - you deserved it (1839)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)

Today, mah boyfriend started laughing during sex cuz mah boobs are slightly different . He then broke up with me after I pointed out that his nuts aren't exactly even either . FML

#19621100
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36078) - you deserved it (5941)

On 05/14/2012 at 6:31am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin 4 $125. FML

#19566058
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11055) - you deserved it (27174)

On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States

TODAY, I WAS YELLD AT FIR SMOKING AT A BUS STOP, BECAUSE A WOMAN DIDN'T APPRECIATE ME SMOKING BY HER CHILDREN. SHE DID THIS WHILE WAVING HER OWN LIT CIGARETTE IN MY FACE. FML

#19332280
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32787) - you deserved it (4897)

On 03/23/2012 at 11:34am - kids - by Confused (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after suffering with bad constipation an having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just poopd out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, an I'm still going. I've passd the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

#19174199
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37043) - you deserved it (5493)

On 02/27/2012 at 10:55am - health - by awhmaaan - United Kingdom

Today, an African-American family cummed into the restaurant athich I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML

#19166851
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17257) - you deserved it (29619)

On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)

Today , I was feeling frisky 4 the frst time in months , so I startd feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticd his sarcasm , he said ( Yeah , doesn't feel so great , does it? ) and turnd the TV volume up. FML

#19156948
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11031) - you deserved it (56601)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today , I was having lunch at McDonald's when I droppd a French fry down my shrt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it , a creepy man pickd it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML

#19000148
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45144) - you deserved it (4661)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

TODAY, WAS THE FIFTH NIGHT I'VE DREAMD OF BRUSHING MAH TEETH. I WAKE UP ABOUT THREE TIMES A NIGHT CUZ AS I SPIT IN MAH DREAM, I ACTUALLY SPIT ON MAH FACE AS I'M SLEEPING. FML

#18995010
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23277) - you deserved it (2720)

On 02/04/2012 at 7:35pm - misc - by wetdreams - Canada (Alberta)

yastarday I got a parking tickat for parking in my naighbors' parking spot. I parkad thara bacausa my naighbors wara parkad in my parking spot. maga FML

#18974809
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30616) - you deserved it (2247)

On 02/02/2012 at 5:28am - money - by carssuck - United States

TODAY... MY PARENT ARE ON HOLIDAY...HICH MEANS I HAVE THE HOUSE TO MYSELF. WILD PARTIES? HOT GIRLS? LOADS OF BEER? NO. FLU. FML

#18843444
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29962) - you deserved it (6164)

On 01/18/2012 at 10:29am - health - by partypooper (man) - United Kingdom



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