timiscuous

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timiscuous

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 100
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About timiscuous : Love New Zealand, football and friends. Come at me

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timiscuous's favorite FMLs

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

by Holy Testacles / 10/17/2012 at 12:45am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML

by painfetish8021 / 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my car alarm went off at a funeral, three times. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 4:37pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Transportation

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous