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theschmoser

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theschmoser
  • Town/Country : Boston, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 12 July 1987 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 236
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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theschmoser's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a surprise birthday party for my mom who turned 57. About an hour into the party, I look over at my mom and she was grinding all over my best friend while holding a bottle of tequila in her hand, and a pair of leopard skin panties hanging out of her pants. FML

#5640699 (111)

I agree, your life sucks (29037) - you deserved it (2585)

On 10/04/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by KmartFart - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I found a letter in the postbox at my new flat which ran something along these lines of: "Hi. We're the gas company. You owe us £1229.79 and have 7 days to pay us. Lotsa love, dated 7th September." FML

#5638823 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (22516) - you deserved it (2517)

On 10/04/2009 at 9:40am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, my computer stopped working. Me, the technology challenged one, decided to do a system recovery on it hoping that I could make it better. Turns out, system recovery means deleting all the files off the computer including family photos, music and assignments and starting fresh. FML

#5636534 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (7714) - you deserved it (35147)

On 10/04/2009 at 3:03am - misc - by rebeccaremily - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML

#5620240 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (30702) - you deserved it (2462)

On 10/03/2009 at 11:34am - health - by Pwnedofthedead (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I realized that I can't shave my unibrow because I have too much acne on my forehead. FML

#5583286 (224)

I agree, your life sucks (42829) - you deserved it (7321)

On 10/01/2009 at 11:49am - health - by ugh (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I received a surprise "absolute final notice" email for payment of an overdue fee from the university I withdrew from 6 months ago. Turns out, my old landlord has been hoarding their letters to me. As a result, my credit is now in the shitter and I had to pay an extra $120 in interest. FML

#5556701 (60)

I agree, your life sucks (22005) - you deserved it (1662)

On 09/29/2009 at 10:11pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend who had just been awakened by her own fart. FML

#5550225 (168)

I agree, your life sucks (54407) - you deserved it (3534)

On 09/29/2009 at 5:21pm - love - by P0wned (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, I found out the reason my clothes have been smelling a little funny isn't because I sweat heavily, it's because of the dead rat in the back of my dryer. FML

#5541455 (50)

I agree, your life sucks (31271) - you deserved it (3526)

On 09/29/2009 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I learned that if you're going to tell your mother you are gay, make sure she isn't holding a frying pan filled with hot grease. FML

#5530332 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (46570) - you deserved it (9936)

On 09/28/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I learned that the gap between the elevator and the 6th floor landing of my apartment building is approximately one key's width wide. FML

#5525122 (118)

I agree, your life sucks (31199) - you deserved it (2187)

On 09/28/2009 at 11:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, was my first day at my new job in a shop. 10 minutes after my first customer leaves I realize she managed to steal $200 worth of merchandise while she had me getting stuff for her from the back room. FML

#5489244 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (24837) - you deserved it (5305)

On 09/26/2009 at 5:23pm - work - by bzygirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML

#5486035 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (37372) - you deserved it (3704)

On 09/26/2009 at 2:21pm - misc - by grossgross (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, we got our progress reports. My physics teacher wrote that I don't participate in class. My mom got mad and grounded me before I could tell her that I raise my hand in class all the time but my teacher won't call on me cause he can't pronounce my name. FML

#5466683 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (34324) - you deserved it (1917)

On 09/25/2009 at 2:22pm - misc - by Non-active (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, the gas station right in front of my apartment had people listening to loud music all night. I have this 3 hour test at 7:30am and didn't get any sleep. Worst of all, here in Brazil, calling the police won't help a thing. Instead of actually helping, they'll stop and join the party. FML

#5462375 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (29970) - you deserved it (2041)

On 09/25/2009 at 4:33am - misc - by stupidpolicia (woman) - Brazil (Distrito Federal)

Today, I went on a trip to DC. When I got back I found out my car was stolen. Apparently they didn't know how to drive a stick because it was only 4 blocks from my house and the engine was blown. FML

#5369923 (128)

I agree, your life sucks (29226) - you deserved it (1281)

On 09/20/2009 at 11:07am - misc - by PoorCar (man) - United States (Washington)



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