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Today, I was about to propose. I got on my knee in front of my girlfriend and opened the box. My friend thought it would be funny to replace the ring with a condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36431) - you deserved it (3010)
On 12/20/2009 at 3:14am - love - by Catholicguy (man) - United States (California)
Today, while I was in confession, I was saying my sins and the priest called me a "pain in the ass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28882) - you deserved it (7245)
On 11/29/2009 at 2:59am - misc - by ? - United States
Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62976) - you deserved it (4395)
On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11328) - you deserved it (3202)
On 10/29/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by crazygirl (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I decided to take a personal day from class and e-mailed all of my profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbucks later, someone behind me says "Glad you're feeling better. Hope you can attend class tomorrow, we'll discuss lying." It was my Ethics professor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4934) - you deserved it (38623)
On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend over webcam with a cute negligee. He was doing homework. Half an hour later, he finally noticed. Apparently pre-calc is more interesting than his girlfriend. I guess polynomials are just curvier than me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12622) - you deserved it (25841)
On 10/07/2009 at 12:39am - love - by NotAParabola (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, it's my birthday. My best friend called me at work and offered to take me out to lunch. When he went to pay for the meal, his card was declined so I told him not to worry and that I would pay for the birthday meal. He looked at me and said "It's your birthday?" He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27647) - you deserved it (2281)
On 09/30/2009 at 1:45pm - misc - by Rockyio (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21160) - you deserved it (76676)
On 09/12/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I found out that on Wednesday, when I have 2 exams, I'm called to testify in court. If I go to court, I cannot make the exams. If I take the exams, I'll be held in contempt and arrested. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34315) - you deserved it (4155)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by livin (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's videocamera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom airvent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61774) - you deserved it (3172)
On 09/07/2009 at 2:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was at my boyfriends house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. As a natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13537) - you deserved it (34849)
On 09/05/2009 at 9:31pm - misc - by JustMyLuck (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my next door neighbor told me that he liked the carpet in my bedroom. I live alone. He's never been in my bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33483) - you deserved it (1387)
On 08/23/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by violatedinden (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my mother told me she's disappointed in me for not going to a better college, and that if I was in the top ten of my class that the rest of those ten must be really dumb. Fact is, I threw away the acceptance letters to Carnegie Mellon and Cornell because I didn't want her to have to pay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19560) - you deserved it (28256)
On 08/21/2009 at 10:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I went on a date with a girl. She drove while texting someone then stopped at a house and told me to wait in the car. She left her phone so I looked at the last text and it says "I'm here for the quicky". Our "date" was a decoy to throw her mom off so she could sleep with another guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57977) - you deserved it (3212)
On 07/19/2009 at 8:44am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61003) - you deserved it (9514)
On 07/12/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by robinhoood (man) - United States (California)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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