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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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thelastlucifer

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thelastlucifer
  • Town/Country : Waterloo, Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 August 1990 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 276
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About thelastlucifer : why so serious

thelastlucifer's last visitors

slim_ladylmc94gruvychildZebrasofa13FreezeMornaiFlippinNicklolle_p0pRiileyLizzJizz

thelastlucifer's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of thelastlucifer's badges

thelastlucifer's favorite FMLs

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

#17307885 (255)

I agree, your life sucks (28506) - you deserved it (2528)

On 07/30/2011 at 10:07am - misc - by ewww - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

#14199055 (320)

I agree, your life sucks (82992) - you deserved it (9946)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

#14164412 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (27158) - you deserved it (46336)

On 12/11/2010 at 9:44am - kids - by parentfail (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML

#13823528 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (43368) - you deserved it (6090)

On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML

#13697892 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (46031) - you deserved it (9597)

On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873 (446)

I agree, your life sucks (80752) - you deserved it (8452)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML

#5049999 (607)

I agree, your life sucks (87652) - you deserved it (18472)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (99709)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML

#4330249 (361)

I agree, your life sucks (70091) - you deserved it (14844)

On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML

#4046377 (763)

I agree, your life sucks (85077) - you deserved it (25503)

On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

#3229865 (454)

I agree, your life sucks (52324) - you deserved it (26555)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

#3146320 (467)

I agree, your life sucks (149042) - you deserved it (22383)

On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839 (298)

I agree, your life sucks (102528) - you deserved it (6141)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

#2799622 (1288)

I agree, your life sucks (32865) - you deserved it (488580)

On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)



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