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thefreelove's favorite FMLs
Today, my 4-year-old daughter couldn't sleep, crying that her teddy bear wants to eat her. My husband thought it would be funny to put the bear right in front of her face while she slept. She's now terrified to sleep anywhere but in our bed. FML
by Anonymous / 03/11/2013 at 7:32pm / Ireland / Kids
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML
by I think its dead / 01/15/2013 at 2:33am / Canada (Manitoba) / Animals
by why? / 01/01/2013 at 12:41am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work
by piece of shed / 08/31/2011 at 10:00am / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML
by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by BiteMe14 / 01/07/2011 at 2:10pm / United States / Love
Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML
by sarah / 07/14/2010 at 12:32am / United States / Health
Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML
by NotThatKind / 08/24/2009 at 12:28am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by j0natron / 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
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- Today, marks the second week straight without sex. Being a newlywed isn't as great as I thought. FML Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His… Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it…