thefmlinator

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Offline (the 04/18/2016 at 7:45am)

thefmlinator

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1577
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About thefmlinator : KNEEL BEFORE ZOD

thefmlinator's page activity

Visits<b>Hazel515</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:57am<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 4:13pm<b>ohishkabibble</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 7:50pm<b>OkayOkayOkayOk</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 12:05pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:01am<b>Squtchy</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 2:35am<b>the_zero_article</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 8:05am<b>ArkeVayden</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 7:15pm<b>BadLuckDude12345</b> - the 04/28/2013 at 6:47am<b>TheRoomFan</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 1:52pm<b>brady88</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 1:43pm<b>DOOMIFIED</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 10:40am<b>ha</b> - the 07/24/2011 at 10:03pm<b>redrovaa</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 9:46pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 8:41pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 09/15/2010 at 7:54pm<b>ilinca_luvsyou</b> - the 08/19/2010 at 12:12am

thefmlinator's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of thefmlinator's badges

thefmlinator's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was picking up my 7 year old daughter at my ex husband's house my daughter started crying saying that she wanted to stay with daddy forever. I asked why. She said her stepmom was a better mommy. Apparently the woman who broke up my marriage is now a better "mommy". FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2009 at 12:13am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere I say "you're my favorite!". Now I'm sitting here talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML

by Damnlife123 / 04/20/2009 at 10:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Kids

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

by Litterbox / 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, my friend and I were seeing a movie. We ended up sitting next to a man who was continually laughing, clapping, and bouncing up and down on his seat. Extremely annoyed, we turned to him and told him to "shut the fuck up". Turns out he had downs syndrome and ran out of the theater crying. FML

by katem / 04/16/2009 at 1:08am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, cops showed up at my apartment demanding to look inside. Satisfied with the search, they told me they had received a noise complaint. More specifically, hearing screams someone believed a girl was getting raped. I had two friends over and we had been wrestling. The three of us are male. FML

by Obee / 04/14/2009 at 10:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend's friend told her she had seen me shopping with a cute girl. When I came back home my girlfriend punched me in the face and asked who the girl was. Apparently her friend didn't tell her the cute girl was my three years old niece. I lost a tooth because of that punch. FML

by GotPunched / 04/11/2009 at 2:36am / Finland (Western Finland) / Love

Today, my siblings came home for the weekend. At dinner, my dad started complaining at how one of my siblings had gotten fired, one was failing college, and the other was gay. He went on to say I was 17 and already had a bright future. I'm pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2009 at 10:55pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was pulled over by my father who is a police officer. He was training a rookie and gave me a breathalyzer test to show his trainee how to do it. I blew a .15 and was taken to jail. FML

by Jesse / 03/20/2009 at 1:48am / United States (Kentucky) / Transportation

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend because I saw him with another woman. I confronted both of them in screaming rage "What the fuck? Are you cheating on me with this ugly slut?" They were in shock. Turns out it was his cousin visiting from New Jersey, he was gonna introduce us at dinner. FML

by nowthatsfcked / 03/13/2009 at 9:18am / Canada / Love

Today, my husband found the box my morning after pill came in. He had a vasectomy 10 years ago. FML

by apricot / 02/09/2009 at 7:46pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has been having an affair with another woman. He works with me and the woman also works in the same company. She is also married and is now 6 months pregnant. They are throwing a baby shower for her on Monday. FML

by Flabbergasted / 02/06/2009 at 4:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

by LifeSucks / 10/29/2008 at 7:57am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids