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theboringdolphin

Offline (the 08/19/2014 at 7:40am) | Search for a member

theboringdolphin

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1179
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About theboringdolphin : hi everyone(: I love people with an awesome sense of humor, I love to read & listen to music. I'm not sure what else to say about myself but if you wanna know more feel free to leave a message!

theboringdolphin's page activity

Visits<b>NehNehPwn</b> - 3 hours ago<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - yesterday at 5:52pm<b>csofball7</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:39am<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:40am<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:24am<b>mattlikesfunions</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:28am<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:14am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:54am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:11pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 7:38am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:08am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:43pm<b>THELEGENDMRT</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 6:49pm<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 2:37am<b>trentask</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 12:40am<b>StiffPvtParts</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 1:31pm<b>Chloe_C_H</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 3:05pm<b>TheKingKen</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 11:32am

theboringdolphin's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of theboringdolphin's badges

theboringdolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, my two-year-old daughter's favourite word is 'No'. After leaving her with my sixteen-year-old brother, she now knows other N words as well. Niet, Nein, Non and Never. Her teenage uncle thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21240415
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32006) - you deserved it (5158)

On 08/18/2014 at 9:26am - kids - by 919191 (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38808) - you deserved it (12368)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I complained to my two roommates about housework not being done. They both put their hands over their ears and started screaming at the top of their voice. They do this pretty much whenever I say anything to them. FML

#21238842
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37357) - you deserved it (4772)

On 08/16/2014 at 8:10am - misc - by Jenn (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40221) - you deserved it (4038)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly at the last of it, looked up smiling and said "thanks". The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML

#21237898
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32802) - you deserved it (9330)

On 08/15/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14253) - you deserved it (67472)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33851) - you deserved it (4937)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

#21237524
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34799) - you deserved it (7640)

On 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

#21237384
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34874) - you deserved it (4526)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:06am - animals - by hopeless romantic - United States (Ohio)

Today, I took part in a raffle that was being organised in the small countryside village where I'm vacationing. I live in big city. I won a duck. A real, live duck. FML

#21237143
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33502) - you deserved it (7735) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/14/2014 at 12:38am - animals - by Anonymous - France

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36853) - you deserved it (2546)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

#21236595
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32024) - you deserved it (5652)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, my boss had a lengthy and obnoxiously egocentric conversation with a colleague. After she left across the office, I stood up, looked over at my colleague, and made a sarcastic "shooting myself in the head" gesture. I saw my boss staring at me over a cubicle wall as I turned around. FML

#21236078
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25524) - you deserved it (18563)

On 08/12/2014 at 7:16pm - work - by bademployee (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36239) - you deserved it (22052)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



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