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theboringdolphin

Offline (the 08/26/2014 at 4:56am) | Search for a member

theboringdolphin

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 30 August 1995 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1210
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About theboringdolphin : hi everyone(: I love people with an awesome sense of humor, I love to read & listen to music. I'm not sure what else to say about myself but if you wanna know more feel free to leave a message!

theboringdolphin's page activity

Visits<b>Mr_Brightside209</b> - yesterday at 11:49am<b>colton_colton</b> - yesterday at 7:56pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 5:42pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:52am<b>peanuty001</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 6:45pm<b>NehNehPwn</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 8:23pm<b>thatoneninjadude</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 5:52pm<b>csofball7</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 9:39am<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:40am<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:24am<b>mattlikesfunions</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:28am<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 4:14am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 3:54am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:11pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 7:38am<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 5:08am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:43pm<b>THELEGENDMRT</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 6:49pm

theboringdolphin's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of theboringdolphin's badges

theboringdolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39181) - you deserved it (6799)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was sitting in a boring lecture. Out of bordom, I made a fish-faces with my mouth. Somehow, I made the most realistic fart noise I've ever heard in the process. The whole room stared at me. FML

Today, I found my cat downstairs with a squirrel dangling from his mouth. When I saw this, I yelled at my cat to put it down. He did. Turns out the squirrel was still alive and run. I had to spend the next three hours chasing it out of my house. FML

#21244619
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28583) - you deserved it (5158)

On 08/24/2014 at 8:08pm - animals - by notmyrealname123 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36929) - you deserved it (6968)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I overheard my dad say "Last time I didn't use a condom, I ended up with Steven, so for god's sake use 'em." I'm Steven. FML

#21244545
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34823) - you deserved it (2728)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I landed my first job as a security officer. Only after I signed all the paperwork did I find out that the area I'll be working is apparently a hotspot for violent shootings. I'm screwed. FML

#21244497
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34290) - you deserved it (5173)

On 08/24/2014 at 4:03pm - work - by fucked - United States (California)

Today, my two-year-old daughter's favourite word is 'No'. After leaving her with my sixteen-year-old brother, she now knows other N words as well. Niet, Nein, Non and Never. Her teenage uncle thinks it's hilarious. FML

#21240415
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34497) - you deserved it (5574)

On 08/18/2014 at 9:26am - kids - by 919191 (woman) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41366) - you deserved it (13431)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I complained to my two roommates about housework not being done. They both put their hands over their ears and started screaming at the top of their voice. They do this pretty much whenever I say anything to them. FML

#21238842
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39052) - you deserved it (4855)

On 08/16/2014 at 8:10am - misc - by Jenn (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42227) - you deserved it (4134)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I went to a café and got some soup. When I was done, a nice waiter came over and offered to take my mostly empty soup bowl. I quickly at the last of it, looked up smiling and said "thanks". The soup dribbled out of my mouth and onto his hand. FML

#21237898
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34155) - you deserved it (9538)

On 08/15/2014 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14877) - you deserved it (70366)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34952) - you deserved it (4976)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after having multiple dreams where I have a daughter with my boyfriend, I'm now emotionally attached to a child who isn't real, and I get depressed when I can't be with her in real life. FML

#21237524
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36179) - you deserved it (7790)

On 08/14/2014 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

#21237384
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36218) - you deserved it (4530)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:06am - animals - by hopeless romantic - United States (Ohio)



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