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Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Up and coming moderator
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Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42438) - you deserved it (8123)
On 04/19/2013 at 3:27am - misc - by thanks gramps - Canada (Yukon Territory)
Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30226) - you deserved it (1849)
On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my dad lost his mind over the meteorite incident in Russia. He's convinced that it's part of some big government conspiracy to cover up a UFO crash-landing, and now he won't stop dismissively calling us "sheep" and telling us "do the research" just because we don't agree with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19018) - you deserved it (1925)
On 02/15/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by dadsadipshit - United States
Today, my mum got a new blender. Dinner was roast beef, broccoli, cauliflower, pumpkin, potatoes and water. In a cup. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29602) - you deserved it (2051)
On 01/31/2013 at 5:28am - health - by I'maboutobarf - Australia
Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25617) - you deserved it (3125)
On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)
Today, my dad forced the whole family to sit through a two-hour lecture, with supporting research, on how the "Mayan prophecy" is actually a load of shit fabricated by conmen. Nice to know he thinks we're all borderline brain-dead, gullible fuckwits who believed it to begin with. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14266) - you deserved it (2950)
On 12/15/2012 at 1:43pm - misc - by oh gee, you don't say (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28460) - you deserved it (4131)
On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21956) - you deserved it (1291)
On 06/11/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by fordneagles (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my apartment was robbed by my landlord. Her logic? "I own the building, and therefore everything in it." That TV cost more than my rent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23709) - you deserved it (1594)
On 05/04/2012 at 10:38am - money - by Eragons_Mommy92 - United States
Today, I was accused of being high. Why? Because I was playing with a milk bottle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12511) - you deserved it (3227)
On 03/23/2012 at 2:18am - misc - by Not_High (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was discussing the possibility of other life in the universe with my friend. She said the universe isn't big enough for it to be possible, and that we would know about it already, because "there are only 8 planets in the universe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19198) - you deserved it (1960)
On 03/11/2012 at 6:37pm - misc - by daninalani (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8253) - you deserved it (42310)
On 02/13/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by SpLo0gIeR - United States
Today, my wife threw a piece of tofu cake at my head for suggesting that the money she'd spent on magic "healing" crystals and homeopathic "remedies" would've just as well been spent on a chocolate teapot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18593) - you deserved it (4830)
On 07/29/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by notabeliever - United States (California)
Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23793) - you deserved it (247724)
On 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm - misc - by ouchers (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39344) - you deserved it (579710)
On 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm - misc - by I_Am_The_Edge (man) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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