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technobeast9's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22867) - you deserved it (6090)

On 09/24/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by smashed (man) - United States

Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36249) - you deserved it (2494)

On 08/30/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by DamnTornadoAlley - United States (Texas)

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13086) - you deserved it (41946)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40135) - you deserved it (4822)

On 02/03/2012 at 1:29pm - animals - by deadhamster - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44269) - you deserved it (5619)

On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

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