About takrushi : 20 year old bored psychology major. No people I can't read your mind.
Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39888) - you deserved it (7637)
On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (56401) - you deserved it (7995)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my long-distance girlfriend drunk dialed me and told me she was horny. Surprised, I exclaimed, "You're horny?" without realizing my boss was right next to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36412) - you deserved it (16133)
On 04/19/2013 at 2:00am - intimacy - by Wallz99 (man) - Pakistan (Azad Kashmir)
Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (52630) - you deserved it (9109)
On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8061) - you deserved it (48604)
On 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm - health - by anon - United States
Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35132) - you deserved it (11256)
On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28260) - you deserved it (4449)
On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46510) - you deserved it (3137) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm - health - by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison (woman) - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)
Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33499) - you deserved it (7833)
On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13638) - you deserved it (36547)
On 02/19/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28072) - you deserved it (6234)
On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22587) - you deserved it (4245)
On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, with 24 inches of snow on the ground, it is raining like hell. The weight of the snow, now full of rain water, collapsed the roof over my living room. I was eating cereal in my underwear, in the living room, directly under the failure. I'm cold. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36118) - you deserved it (2958)
On 02/11/2013 at 3:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I discovered the true meaning of being scared shitless. My father in a clown costume emerged from my closet. Needless to say something emerged from me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24325) - you deserved it (1741)
On 02/02/2013 at 9:12am - misc - by wilks311 - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (41287) - you deserved it (3134) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by dr mamour - Sent from mobile version
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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