Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Online | Search for a member
About tacojauns : I love Animations, Cartoons, Newgrounds, YouTube, Kenny Vs. Spenny(TV Show), Music (Ska, Oldies and Punk are my favorite) and other things like snowmobiling, motorcycleing, hunting, paintball, gambling, Texas Hold 'em etc... message me about anything if you'd like. I'm a regular on this site maybe not a regular commenter but I'm on here pretty much daily P.S. sometimes I write good comment sometime bad most of my comments are sarcastic. oh well
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?
You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!
Today, I was confiding in my dad over the phone, after I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. After I hung up and went online, I noticed he'd been live-blogging the whole call on Facebook and commenting that he was considering suicide to escape the boredom. FML
Today, for the first time in my life, my dad said he was proud of me. It meant a lot to me, and I started tearing up. Noticing my emotion, he looked at me pityingly, said "Aaaaand it's gone." and walked out of the room. FML
Today, I was looking at some cellphones with my dad, when an assistant asked if we needed help. My dad said, "Yeah, does this have parental controls? My son watches some freaky stuff, some damn freaky stuff." I don't watch anything weird, but thanks for humiliating me, dad. FML
Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML
Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML
Friday 31 July 2015