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t0m3y

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t0m3y

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1632
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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2DAY I WAS IN MAH NEW BOYFRIEND'S APARTMENT FIR THE FRST TIME. AS I WAS FLIPPING THROUGH HIS PHOTO ALBUMS, I CUMMED ACROSS ONE FULL OF DISTURBINGLY CANDID PICTURES OF ME. I FOUND SOME AS EARLY AS MAH TRIP TO THE STATE FAIR, THREE YERES AGO. I MET MAH BOYFRIEND TWO MONTHS AGO. FML

#3398201
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (154884) - you deserved it (9877)

On 07/01/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML

#3361418
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57511) - you deserved it (8771)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:53am - health - by poopshooter101 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today... mah daughter askd me what is the youngest age at which u should start having sex. Bieng a good mom... I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been marrid. My daughter then said... ( Oh... shoot... ) and walkd away. My daughter is twelve. fat FML

#3344863
474 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71740) - you deserved it (12583)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)

TODAY, AT THE AIRPORT, MY MOM BEGAN TALKING ABOUT HOW USELESS THE WAR IN IRAQ WAS, AND HOW DUMB THE SOLDIERS THAT SERVE THERE WERE FOR ENLISTING DURING THE WAR. THE SOLDIER AT THE VENDING MACHINE NEAR US CAUGHT MY EYE. I MOUTHD, "SORRY" AND HE MOUTHD, SLOWLY, "YOU FUCKIN' BETTER BE." FML

#3232657
685 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86913) - you deserved it (19896)

On 06/26/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by ILuvYouSoldiers (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today.. . Mah Mom Put Some Bubblewrap On Mah Desk Because She Thought I Would Have Fun With It . I'm 18 . It Was Awesome . Mega FML

#3229865
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68583) - you deserved it (40121)

On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)

2day I was riding on the back of my dad's motorcycle . After a few minutes, the vibrations from the engine became way too much 4 me and I couldn't control myself . I had such an intense orgasm, sitting right behind my father, with my arms around his waist . FML

#3192725
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83472) - you deserved it (14239)

On 06/25/2009 at 12:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today , wile reading some cemistry notes I came across te term "solid water" . Completely stumpd , I askd myself , "Wat te ell is solid water?" Ten I eard ma little cousin say "ice." I'm a 4t year science major in university . He still cecks te closet 4 monsters . FML

#3142518
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27944) - you deserved it (79894)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:19am - work - by uneek14 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, was mah boyfriend's brthday . He wanted a blowjobhile playing Call of Duty 4 . In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller downhen he died . Into mah head . FML

#3078421
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60457) - you deserved it (25990)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:16am - intimacy - by jinxofsocal (woman) - United States (California)

Today , mah older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors , they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They looool don't. FML

#3016666
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14946) - you deserved it (100519)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by kat9232000 - Canada (Alberta)

TODAY , I WAS AT MCDONALD'S AND I WAS GOING THROUGH THE DRIVE-THRU. AS I WAS DRIVING AWAY , I CHECKD MAH FOOD AND THE LADY HAD GIVEN ME A NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM HAPPY MEAL TOY BY MISTAKE. I GOT SO EXCITD THAT I CRASHD THE CAR INTO A POLE. I'M 36. FML

#2966896
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28653) - you deserved it (65470)

On 06/17/2009 at 12:35pm - misc - by NotSoYoung (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was enjoying some much needd serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To mah surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessd, gets up, gives me a nod an leaves. FML

#2932416
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74556) - you deserved it (5540)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I rode mah bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal fir turning left. A car passing the opposite way veerd towards me and attemptd to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over mah body and mah bike is in two pieces. FML

#2925389
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81060) - you deserved it (5552)

On 06/15/2009 at 10:13pm - misc - by Shaun (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, In science class I sit next to friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML

#2831839
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (141170) - you deserved it (10057)

On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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