Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

switchgurl20

Offline (21 hours ago) | Search for a member

switchgurl20

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 December 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1184
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About switchgurl20 : Weird, quirky.
Im from trinidad in the caribbean. Lifes good, good to be content.
I say stupid stuff without thinking sometimes.
I like grunge rock like nirvana
Punk rock like green day, sum 41, puddle of mudd
Alternative rock like avril lavigne, maroon 5- adam is hot!, switchfoot, foo fighters
Some christian rock like stellar kart, delirious.

If ya feel the need, hit me up with some messages.

switchgurl20's page activity

Visits<b>wvni</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 8:24am<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:38pm<b>yuubi</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 2:15pm<b>Conn3ct</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 1:23am<b>BU2012</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 11:05am<b>JukeMasterFlex</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 4:47am<b>mangoboy1</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 12:28pm<b>Snugmybaby95</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 11:03pm<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 7:29pm<b>jimbobpete</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 11:02am<b>fmlbear324</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 6:10pm<b>ignoremeimweird</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 4:59pm<b>dami_khan</b> - the 10/07/2012 at 11:18am<b>CaptainPickles72</b> - the 02/23/2012 at 10:32pm<b>MarineMech2391</b> - the 08/21/2011 at 8:46pm<b>rallets</b> - the 07/14/2011 at 7:12pm<b>iluvboobies</b> - the 07/13/2011 at 7:49pm<b>CrackAttack</b> - the 07/13/2011 at 7:24pm

switchgurl20's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of switchgurl20's badges

switchgurl20's favorite FMLs

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

#19593515
446 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14410) - you deserved it (36251)

On 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just say that my armpit is now drenched in lube. I'm afraid of what he's going to want to try once he gets bored of this. FML

#18370889
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38079) - you deserved it (9349)

On 11/27/2011 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was shopping, I saw my old friend from high school. After a bit of talking, I ended up giving her my phone number. I wrote it on an old receipt. Little did I remember, the receipt was from when I bought lube and condoms. FML

#18146927
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15359) - you deserved it (35237)

On 11/03/2011 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by snownerd - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML

#18145171
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62515) - you deserved it (4628)

On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home from school, only to find I was locked out. The cars were all there, but no one was in. It wasn't until I heard continuous banging from my parents' window that it clicked. They locked me out for over an hour in freezing weather just to have sex. FML

#18138083
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38010) - you deserved it (4157)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:37pm - intimacy - by miley098 - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

#18112620
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23701) - you deserved it (15448)

On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML

#18098530
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29990) - you deserved it (17628)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I finally found out where my great grandmother's antique handheld mirror disappeared to. According to the headmaster, my eleven year old son has been using it to look up his classmates' dresses at school. FML

#18095275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (2850)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:25am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML

#17981660
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31563) - you deserved it (2232)

On 10/14/2011 at 10:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27029) - you deserved it (6226)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was having horrible morning sickness. I was violently throwing up, could hardly breathe, and was gasping for air between each round of puking. My husband, in the other room playing video games, snapped and shouted, "Why can't you just be quiet?!" FML

#17311021
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42050) - you deserved it (6137)

On 07/30/2011 at 5:06pm - health - by Ceej - United States (Illinois)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37610) - you deserved it (9718)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60210) - you deserved it (12591)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my kids that our family dog was getting too fat and we should give him a little less food. My youngest daughter whispered to her sister, "Mommy's fat and we still give her food." FML

#16303976
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32862) - you deserved it (18323)

On 05/22/2011 at 9:33pm - kids - by Fatty1970 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup. A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said, "Are you crying because you're ugly?" FML

#16116610
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43308) - you deserved it (5441) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: