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swimmer3141

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swimmer3141

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 January 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1627
  • Number of comments : 52
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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swimmer3141's page activity

Visits<b>drpepper2019</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:47pm<b>shane_109</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:36pm<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 5:18am<b>cameron194</b> - the 12/21/2012 at 5:50am<b>wannabesinger</b> - the 09/14/2012 at 11:55pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:19pm<b>jren207</b> - the 08/06/2011 at 10:49am<b>raphanne</b> - the 08/05/2011 at 11:16pm<b>Gigglebear</b> - the 08/05/2011 at 7:32pm<b>sourgirl101</b> - the 07/17/2011 at 3:18pm

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swimmer3141's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML

#18369717
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28020) - you deserved it (1669)

On 11/27/2011 at 8:07pm - misc - by wow - United States (Texas)

Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML

#18353001
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10370) - you deserved it (28825)

On 11/26/2011 at 12:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

#18312960
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34196) - you deserved it (6016)

On 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm - animals - by furryballoon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered my wife and I have referred to our two-year-old as 'cutie' or 'beautiful' so many times she won't respond to her own name. FML

#18304597
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11904) - you deserved it (37706)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:23am - kids - by BadFather (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a very long, complicated talk with my girlfriend. Apparently, since she isn't religious, she doesn't have to give anyone Christmas presents, and yet expects everyone to give her some. She then told me what I should get her. FML

#18289031
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33640) - you deserved it (4605)

On 11/19/2011 at 12:50pm - misc - by John (man) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

#18279694
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35188) - you deserved it (4739)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States

Today, the main topic for my sister and her friends in the car was how many ways they could think of to kill me. They came up with 137. I have to spend a week with these people. FML

#18279244
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24565) - you deserved it (2296)

On 11/18/2011 at 4:01am - health - by xattackattackx - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35589) - you deserved it (18795)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I finished a very important but annoying presentation that took four hours to complete. Only after writing a paragraph to explain the presentation and sending it to my boss did I realize that I saved the document as "Shit I have to do to get a promotion." FML

#18231005
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10596) - you deserved it (38935)

On 11/12/2011 at 7:36pm - work - by TTR (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you deserved it (5173) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44774) - you deserved it (5026)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML

#17965176
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24136) - you deserved it (3691)

On 10/12/2011 at 1:14am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33003) - you deserved it (4450)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38071) - you deserved it (3133)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my brother handed me a sandwich that I'd asked him to make for me. Halfway through eating the sandwich, he started laughing hysterically. I still don't know what was in it. FML

#17823625
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27027) - you deserved it (6540)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)



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