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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Fingerprints everywhere
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1398) - you deserved it (11651)
On 05/18/2012 at 2:07am - misc - by Karmaisabitch - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3300) - you deserved it (10704)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2768) - you deserved it (6298)
On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States
Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3584) - you deserved it (12382) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9827) - you deserved it (489)
On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5105) - you deserved it (22355)
On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (3336) - you deserved it (14336) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, a guy asked me out and said he was going to take me to a fancy restaurant where they make the food in front of you. I love Japanese food, so I was really excited. We went to Subway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8671) - you deserved it (1387)
On 04/11/2012 at 12:54pm - love - by mista_sandy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to yet again tell my mother-in-law that I wasn't going to name my unborn baby "Ermintrude" after her late mother. My husband told me to stop being difficult, and that he agrees that it would be nice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8615) - you deserved it (626)
On 03/22/2012 at 1:14pm - kids - by futuremum (woman) - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)
Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2412) - you deserved it (15893)
On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14613) - you deserved it (2107)
On 03/07/2012 at 8:08pm - work - by Janitor (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, my new roommate told me he was bisexual. A little concerned, I opened up and told him that made me uncomfortable. His reply: "Oh don't worry, I'm only attracted to good looking guys." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8872) - you deserved it (29638)
On 03/07/2012 at 9:01am - misc - by Leland - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my 8-year-old niece corrected my spelling via text message. FML
I agree, your life sucks (344) - you deserved it (8599)
On 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML
I agree, your life sucks (5572) - you deserved it (17105)
On 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by argh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while I was eating lunch at work, I practically had a panic attack because I'd forgotten to feed my Neopet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2415) - you deserved it (8129)
On 02/26/2012 at 4:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
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