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swampbaby985

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swampbaby985

4Fucked!

swampbaby985swampbaby985
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 November 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3826
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About swampbaby985 : I come here mostly for shits and giggles, nothing more.

swampbaby985's page activity

Visits<b>audreymatteaxox</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:16pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 1:11pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 3:37am<b>KhazKhazz</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 12:30am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 7:39am<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 07/01/2015 at 9:03pm<b>XxKimixUchihaxX</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 2:50am<b>keiNan</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 3:47pm<b>Illuminanomous</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 1:14am<b>watermelon1</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:46pm<b>Hauclir</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 12:50pm<b>Sludge3</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 7:12pm<b>Vertain</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:24am<b>MomentoMori</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 7:31am<b>menabella</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 12:36pm<b>twistedtwincity</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:27am<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 5:45am<b>enphinitie</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 4:26am

Fucked!<b>Duckzy</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 5:28am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 11:50pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 3:16am<b>braybrayden</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 4:31am

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swampbaby985's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44207) - you deserved it (5096)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend dropped by my work to break up with me. I had to go the rest of my shift with a smile, fighting back tears. I work as the Cinderella at Disney Land. FML

#18358033
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70428) - you deserved it (3485)

On 11/26/2011 at 4:54pm - love - by notsohappilyeverafter - United States (California)

Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML

#18350847
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7555) - you deserved it (58641)

On 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was called by a restricted number. The man on the phone then explained to me in detail what I was doing at every second that I was on the phone with him. I'm scared to leave my house. FML

#18304644
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46141) - you deserved it (2841)

On 11/21/2011 at 1:28am - misc - by bizzyizzy0121 - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27093) - you deserved it (7987)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37362) - you deserved it (19312)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41673) - you deserved it (8046)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

#18224618
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41673) - you deserved it (8046)

On 11/12/2011 at 12:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to the store to pick up some tampons. After waiting in line for about 10 minutes, the male cashier looked at me when I was leaving and said, "Have a nice... week!" FML

#18023767
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31755) - you deserved it (4664)

On 10/19/2011 at 3:36pm - misc - by sarah (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28366) - you deserved it (8242)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

#17838831
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37529) - you deserved it (7042)

On 09/26/2011 at 11:35am - intimacy - by Oops (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55325) - you deserved it (2800)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML

#17789217
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33957) - you deserved it (2978)

On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32026) - you deserved it (8567)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

#17706134
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16508) - you deserved it (51661)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by omfgnooo (man) - United States (New York)



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