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swampbaby985

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swampbaby985

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swampbaby985swampbaby985
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 November 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3163
  • Number of comments : 73
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About swampbaby985 : I come here mostly for shits and giggles, nothing more.

swampbaby985's page activity

Visits<b>patts_</b> - yesterday at 9:25am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - yesterday at 10:32pm<b>happysmile987</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 3:22pm<b>SabrinaEpic3</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 2:45am<b>ndnpride88</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 6:51am<b>sam882</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:20pm<b>Bostern</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 8:04pm<b>gis0392</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 12:37pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:50am<b>sdroze1389</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 4:31pm<b>devildog562</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 12:18pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 11:31pm<b>BBlah</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 11:07pm<b>vegasked</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 4:48pm<b>melsweet</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 3:23pm<b>sneakattacked</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 12:09am<b>chillandfun</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 4:05am<b>Aliakatherin</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 12:12pm

Liked!<b>Duckzy</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 5:28am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 11:50pm<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 3:16am<b>braybrayden</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 4:31am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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swampbaby985's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with a hangover after an intense night out. I decided to look at my camera to figure out what happened the night before. All my pictures were deleted except one video of me dancing to Lollipop by Lil Wayne, and giving a lapdance and head to my giant plush rat. FML

#2454603
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9464) - you deserved it (51966)

On 05/31/2009 at 1:48am - misc - by crunkdrunk (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

#2405054
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51117) - you deserved it (8362)

On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

#2076493
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59984) - you deserved it (8471)

On 05/19/2009 at 10:04am - kids - by nana (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was selected to give my speech to the entire school. I was later told it had to be censored because it was inappropriate, even though I was just trying to make a point. My speech was on political correctness. My speech on political correctness was censored for political reasons. FML

#1973868
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44644) - you deserved it (4571)

On 05/16/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, was my first meeting with business partners as I am new to the team. Instead of saying that I was looking forward to "stretching my legs" or "spreading my wings", I told them I was anxious to start "spreading my legs". FML

#1683242
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57504) - you deserved it (20002)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML

#1490808
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15001) - you deserved it (62980)

On 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm - misc - by Telemistake (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter walked in on me taking a shower. She said, "Hey, yours is the same size as Dylan's!" My daughter has seen Dylan's penis, which apparently is the same size as mine. My daughter and Dylan are 7. FML

#1409707
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109228) - you deserved it (8548)

On 04/27/2009 at 11:06pm - intimacy - by seriouslywtf (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

#1346080
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83474) - you deserved it (5677)

On 04/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by calliefml (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to dinner with my boyfriend. After we ordered, I started to unzip his fly really slowly. As I put my hand in his boxers, he stands up to greet his mom and dad who were joining us for dinner. FML

#868136
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18417) - you deserved it (100778)

On 04/08/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by cdoyle - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML

#866665
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20260) - you deserved it (73231)

On 04/08/2009 at 2:38am - misc - by thatwasmiz (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my patient, a chubby little girl, stood on a scale to measure her weight. She was 5 yrs old and weighed 65 lbs. I started giving her advice on eating healthy: fruits, vegetables, and more greens. She turned to her mother giving a look of shock and said, "But mommy, the doctor is fat too!" FML

#810439
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52314) - you deserved it (18862)

On 04/05/2009 at 12:25am - kids - by Shnur (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when my boyfriend reffered to my hair, I told him I was going to dye it. He responded by saying, "finally, so how much you going for, 40, maybe 50 pounds?". I said dye it, not diet. FML

#810319
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57802) - you deserved it (8561)

On 04/05/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by lifestinks - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

#798927
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19978) - you deserved it (148687)

On 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by ohshittttttt (woman) - United States (New York)



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