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swampbaby985

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swampbaby985

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 November 1986 (27 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1680
  • Number of comments : 68
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About swampbaby985 : I come here mostly for shits and giggles, nothing more.

swampbaby985's page activity

Visits<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 10:33pm<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 2:33am<b>minioncandy</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:16pm<b>JoshArson</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:06am<b>shadowedpixie</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 4:39am<b>pptm</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 2:31am<b>lululatenight</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:07pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 12:23am<b>KawaiiPenguin13</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 9:56pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:26am<b>ShortyJorty</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:46am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 7:40pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 3:18pm<b>Testing1234</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 3:43am<b>abylenee_</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 4:11pm<b>prideslegion</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:17am<b>jgwyh</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:07pm<b>maxface</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:12am

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swampbaby985's favorite FMLs

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57238) - you deserved it (10847)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

#20494997
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34439) - you deserved it (6683)

On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend came over for a family brunch, during which he told my mother, in vivid detail, how he gets the shits whenever he eats kale chips. FML

#20483441
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21187) - you deserved it (2596)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:02pm - health - by shitty situation - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48434) - you deserved it (10106)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22335) - you deserved it (2307)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, I jokingly tried to convince my girlfriend that Wyoming was a government conspiracy and did not exist. She believed me. FML

#20193447
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18377) - you deserved it (5178)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:24am - misc - by whaleninjapoop - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my mom has officially lost 100 pounds due to a lap-band surgery. After sharing her excitement, she also shared her troubles. She said, "Everything hangs now, even my cooter. Can they fix that?" Thank you for the mental image, mom. FML

#20159898
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18277) - you deserved it (1486)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:25am - health - by KtSue - United States

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25917) - you deserved it (1828)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML

#20118693
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26813) - you deserved it (3316)

On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

#20113152
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26720) - you deserved it (1896)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by Dino (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

#20083352
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25026) - you deserved it (25415)

On 09/22/2012 at 10:06am - intimacy - by holyshitbatman - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got engaged. My family is already placing bets on how long it will take for my fiancée to "wise up and ditch" me. FML

#20077487
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20928) - you deserved it (1936)

On 09/18/2012 at 7:22am - love - by thanksfamily (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

#20015372
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32884) - you deserved it (2019)

On 08/11/2012 at 3:37pm - work - by mikeissad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

#19999762
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29072) - you deserved it (2550)

On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25782) - you deserved it (12304)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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