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superpoptart

Offline (the 07/27/2015 at 1:41pm) | Search for a member

superpoptart

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 15 June 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2788
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About superpoptart : Giraffe.

superpoptart's page activity

Visits<b>HPCullen251</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 9:02pm<b>Exaspera</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 1:11am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 9:10pm<b>NickVsHtml</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 8:56am<b>Bassel7</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 4:30am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 10:56am<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 9:25am<b>Wondermage</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 6:29pm<b>badbitchxx</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 11:48am<b>amyfann</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:42am<b>drunk_in_love</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 6:33pm<b>mischiefkel</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 11:15am<b>Henriqu3e</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 3:27am<b>missloud</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 4:04pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 2:27am<b>boobear19883</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 10:53pm<b>nineteen99</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 3:56pm<b>emily1015</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 10:10pm

Fucked!<b>drunk_in_love</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 12:33am

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superpoptart's favorite FMLs

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30635) - you deserved it (6264)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37663) - you deserved it (3890)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, I finally got to conduct my first questioning of a suspect, who had been arrested in connection with a car theft. As I recited the Miranda warning to him, my mind went totally blank, and after a few seconds, he sarcastically continued the speech for me. FML

#20464395
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30412) - you deserved it (14565)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:15pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48201) - you deserved it (7213) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50871) - you deserved it (10628)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

#20413213
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (4347)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by divingconfidence (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, after several years spent hung up on my ex, I was finally moving on. I was on a date with my new boyfriend when my ex walked past us. He broke down crying, got on his knees, and begged me to come back. FML

#20402543
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34019) - you deserved it (3555)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:57pm - love - by Miki (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I spent nearly half an hour trying to dispel my sister's belief that men have to strap down their penises before going jogging. FML

#20402473
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29840) - you deserved it (3649)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, I dropped my handbag into a water-filled gutter. As I was hurriedly fishing out the contents of my bag, I looked up. There was my ex, with the girl he left me for walking past, timed exactly to coincide with me manically scooping up one of many rapidly absorbing tampons. FML

#20194448
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25065) - you deserved it (1944)

On 12/06/2012 at 10:11pm - love - by shamefaced (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

#20170605
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14328) - you deserved it (32975)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

#20137874
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18711) - you deserved it (3628)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by Medic - United States (Washington)

Today, a cute girl sitting next to me asked if she could use my phone. As I handed it to her, I attempted to use the expression "knock yourself out," but for a reason I can still not fathom, it came out as "kill yourself." FML

#20120541
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27480) - you deserved it (6996)

On 10/17/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by Holy Testacles (man) - United States

Today, I got yelled at for providing horrible customer service, in a store I don't even work for. FML

#20094580
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23102) - you deserved it (1683)

On 09/30/2012 at 1:32am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head on the living room couch. Apparently his two cats didn't approve, and they started attacking my face. Luckily for him, since my boyfriend was holding my head down, his privates didn't get a scratch. FML

#20022569
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26387) - you deserved it (4895)

On 08/15/2012 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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