About superpoptart : Giraffe.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18775) - you deserved it (2420)
On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16545) - you deserved it (2157)
On 05/17/2012 at 11:02am - love - by Vero (woman) - Austria (Oberosterreich)
Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23520) - you deserved it (2509)
On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I started the job of my dreams. Our first marketing meeting was an in-depth analysis of the phrase, "Haters gonna hate, potatoes gonna potate". I have a 5 year contract. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14896) - you deserved it (3461)
On 05/12/2012 at 10:36am - work - by picklet (woman) - Malaysia (Negeri Sembilan)
Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10059) - you deserved it (29166)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15176) - you deserved it (1517)
On 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33522) - you deserved it (2675)
On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon
Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML
I agree, your life sucks (16923) - you deserved it (3135)
On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I asked my mom if she could buy me some anti-nausea medicine. She said, "You just have a stomach ache. It's not like you're throwing up." As she said it, I threw up everything but my childhood memories. She still wouldn't get any medicine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18498) - you deserved it (1613)
On 03/19/2012 at 3:20pm - health - by Shleebs (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21699) - you deserved it (1515)
On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22891) - you deserved it (3958)
On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada
Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18753) - you deserved it (1706)
On 02/18/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by district12 (man) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29975) - you deserved it (4911)
On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19279) - you deserved it (5042)
On 02/17/2012 at 8:25am - misc - by BOOP - United States (Montana)
Today, someone peed in my physical education locker. The only way someone could've done it is with a ladder. I'm so popular it hurts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19457) - you deserved it (3397)
On 02/15/2012 at 7:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Friday 24 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
