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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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stevenstyle

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stevenstyle
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 186
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Today, while walking in the mall, I spotted my ex boyfriend with his friends. To make myself look less lonely, I put my iPhone up to my ear and started an imaginary conversation with my invisible boyfriend. As I passed him, my phone started ringing loudly. It was him calling. He knew I was faking. FML

#5820033 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (5442) - you deserved it (25719)

On 10/13/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was checking out my boyfriend's facebook profile. I saw that he had just taken the "How long will it take for your girldriend to realize you're cheating on her?" Quiz. FML

#4034087 (165)

I agree, your life sucks (41256) - you deserved it (3821)

On 07/25/2009 at 5:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML

#3998492 (232)

I agree, your life sucks (59279) - you deserved it (5185)

On 07/24/2009 at 3:04am - kids - by tony (man) - United States (California)

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokemon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokemon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030 (321)

I agree, your life sucks (12878) - you deserved it (53051)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

#3950301 (181)

I agree, your life sucks (63759) - you deserved it (4387)

On 07/22/2009 at 10:12am - intimacy - by Gordon (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, a resident went missing at our nursing home. When I found him, a man in a blue shirt and red pants, he started yelling at me in confusion. I just thought it was his alzheimers. When I brought him to my administrator, I was told the missing resident was wearing a red shirt and blue pants. Wrong guy. FML

#3933300 (65)

I agree, your life sucks (12851) - you deserved it (25475)

On 07/21/2009 at 4:22pm - health - by torkx3 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML

#3932476 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (51325) - you deserved it (2651)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:47pm - intimacy - by emkatch (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, and dropped a condom in the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!". FML

#3932433 (377)

I agree, your life sucks (45400) - you deserved it (20573)

On 07/21/2009 at 3:45pm - intimacy - by uh-oh (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML

#3723567 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (5977) - you deserved it (43903)

On 07/13/2009 at 6:18pm - misc - by iJehx (man) - United States (Texas)