stevenJB

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stevenJB

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stevenJBstevenJB
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 May 1941 (75 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 17061
  • Number of comments : 420
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About stevenJB : 9/28/2016
Hey, you're my latest stalker. feel free to message me here or on kik "Lockolaine". otherwise here's the run down of me.

-I (used to) play guitar and bass, will start in again soon.
-enlisting in the Marines(leave for BC in feb)
-5´11 or 510 depending on who measures me
-gamer, mostly Wow, WoT, overwatch, starcraft 2 and fallout lately.
-listens to rock, metal mostly, a little bit of country, punk, some pop I just hear on the radio, symphony and some jazz as well.
-native American and used to have hair over a meter long.
-enjoy watching movies/anime
-can sing, but not amazingly
-heavy machinery operator/mechanic
-lives in South Dakota
-love dogs, though I don't have one myself :(
-enjoys firearms and long range shooting
-Love reading books, more into fantasy genre.
-I'll do a fuck for a fuck so feel free.
-my fml profile is around or close to 5 years old.
-enjoy running and working out.


--if you got any questions feel free to ask--


stevenJB's page activity

Visits<b>Srxjo</b> - yesterday at 6:20pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - yesterday at 5:54pm<b>lunalane</b> - yesterday at 12:55pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 10:56pm<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 5:28pm<b>YaskYhw</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 5:01pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/01/2016 at 9:44am<b>missa8604</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 10:58pm<b>chirstinap325</b> - the 11/30/2016 at 9:24pm<b>paris_ava</b> - the 11/29/2016 at 2:52pm<b>TheRareDoge</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 2:00pm<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 11/27/2016 at 1:24am<b>randyp5655</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 5:20pm<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 7:09am<b>sapoi99</b> - the 11/26/2016 at 3:18am<b>frankmz</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 11:45pm<b>BabooonLove</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 9:47pm<b>haddiej</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 4:20pm

Fucked!<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 11:01pm<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 12/05/2016 at 6:10am<b>YaskYhw</b> - the 12/03/2016 at 11:00pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 12:18pm<b>TheGreastest</b> - the 11/25/2016 at 10:13am<b>Talzzz123</b> - the 11/24/2016 at 4:20am<b>wheresmymary</b> - the 11/17/2016 at 5:44am<b>PrincessWinter</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 11:57pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 11/04/2016 at 4:32pm<b>CAT47LOVE</b> - the 11/02/2016 at 5:47am<b>URBeingLied2</b> - the 10/26/2016 at 7:04am<b>Marissa20358</b> - the 10/25/2016 at 6:18pm<b>CamBen</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 11:58pm<b>Cow_Girl_Lilly</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 1:24pm<b>lunalane</b> - the 10/08/2016 at 5:09am<b>dudeutookhrs</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 3:58am<b>r1has</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 10:57am<b>TwistedWires</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 7:04am

stevenJB's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of stevenJB's badges

stevenJB's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML

by SURPRISE / 06/09/2009 at 8:13pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I walked into the bathroom and found my sister cleaning her vibrator. With my toothbrush. FML

by quadropheniac / 06/09/2009 at 12:18pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a bar with some buddies, and after trying to pick up a few girls, one of my friends got a number. When I heard the number I said 'Sorry man, that's definitely the rejection hotline number'. So many girls have given me that number, I memorized it. FML

by toobad / 06/02/2009 at 1:41am / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was in Walmart. I saw a demo for Guitar Hero on the DS so I started playing. I was kicking ass and really feeling great about myself. I then looked away for a second, looked back down, and saw that the notes were still being hit. The demo had been on automatic-player the entire time. FML

by theskippster / 05/29/2009 at 9:10pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2009 at 1:04am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I was at a mall. A woman stopped by me, said slowly and loudly, in Spanish "baño?" Knowing a bit of Spanish, I nodded and pointed the restrooms out for her. She then mutters about "dang Mexicans and their inability to speak English". I'm not even Latina. I'm Irish-American. FML

by Anon / 05/26/2009 at 1:45pm / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom talked about how it's interesting how there's so many different size of penises. She also told me that since she's doing hormone therapy she's able to orgasm a LOT more. We were stuck in stop and go traffic for 3 hours. When I turned on the radio, she turned it off and talked more. FML

by ITSnotFUNNYtoMEass / 05/25/2009 at 4:54am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

by Tootsy_Roll_Pop / 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a dollar store with a couple friends to buy cap guns to play with. We were having a lot of fun with them, and took them onto a bus. 5 minutes later, three cops got on, handcuffed us, and sternly talked to us about the dangers of guns. We got arrested for toy guns. We are 17. FML

by arrestedgun / 05/23/2009 at 3:37am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my best friend why she didn't ask our other best friend Anna to be a bridesmaid in her wedding. She said, "She's too pretty. I need ugly bridesmaids to make me look better." I am the maid of honor. FML

by Neverthebride / 05/22/2009 at 6:21pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I kissed my husband and said "I love you." Thats when our 5 year old son said to my husband "How can you love her so much if she's so ugly?" FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2009 at 8:20pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I went to my girlfriend's Catholic all girls high school to ask her to prom by decorating her car. As soon as I walked on campus the school went into lock down because of a "suspicious male intruder." When I saw my girlfriend, she denied knowing me. I was arrested. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 11:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while going for a run in my neighbourhood I was hit by a car not once, but twice. The second car, closely following the first, stopped and then drove forward to see if I was all right. FML

by OUCH / 05/19/2009 at 1:17am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

by emoney / 05/18/2009 at 8:04pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 6 year old daughter saw a man in a wheelchair who's leg had been amputated. She walks up to him and says, "What happened?". He answers kindly that he's a war veteran. She then responds, "Well then you deserve to get your leg blown off. You shouldn't be killing people." FML

by embarrassedmom / 05/17/2009 at 9:19pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids