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stevenJB

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stevenJB

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7580
  • Number of comments : 396
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 23 posted

About stevenJB : Yay you're my latest stalker! :D well, just to start off...I'm a rocker and metalhead so I listen to alot of punk,metal, rock. All that good stuff. I'm native American and have long black hair that is a few inches over a meter long (longer than my arm if I hold it out). I play electric guitar,bass guitar and sing some too. If you wanna know anything or know anything just send me a message. Because I have alot of free time >.> and feel free to kik me: "lockolaine"
"The only thing you should feel when you shoot somebody, is the recoil"

stevenJB's page activity

Visits<b>PePziNL</b> - 16 minutes ago<b>Crusher74</b> - yesterday at 6:39am<b>MelissaBrynes</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:46am<b>xxxxnikkix</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 11:14pm<b>hopsinlove17</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 1:03am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:18pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:27pm<b>xauuxa</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:45pm<b>ButterflyHaze</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 3:59pm<b>ThisDirtyDreamer</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:54am<b>KailaWayla</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Crlnprz</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:42am<b>bubblegumbitch16</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 4:14pm<b>dozer116</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 1:44pm<b>maddyylion</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:40pm<b>ItsJustMe1616</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 2:33pm<b>CAC_Boomerang</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:57am<b>meepmerp</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 5:00pm

stevenJB's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of stevenJB's badges

stevenJB's favorite FMLs

Today, I witnessed my husband swat a coffee bean over and over again, all the while mistaking it for a fly. I then figured he probably has a lower IQ than I do, which wouldn't be so bad if mine wasn't a few points away from minor retardation. FML

#19340403
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20134) - you deserved it (5491)

On 03/24/2012 at 7:06pm - misc - by sheilob (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46634) - you deserved it (4528)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I spotted a $100 bill on the ground. Being a little strapped for cash, I excitedly picked it up. I discovered it was one of those religious tract papers made to look like a folded bill, with a message scolding me for being greedy. FML

#19328317
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25956) - you deserved it (4145)

On 03/22/2012 at 7:32pm - misc - by Anon (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was stabbed in the chest. Not with a knife though, the under-wire from my bra escaped and stabbed me in the boob. FML

#19321337
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22090) - you deserved it (2815)

On 03/21/2012 at 5:06pm - misc - by J.O.S (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while driving home from school, I noticed one of our hot quarterbacks in the car behind me. Trying to impress him, I pulled into the driveway of an expensive-looking house. To my horror, he pulled in behind me and asked what I was doing at his house. FML

#19320311
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9949) - you deserved it (61208)

On 03/21/2012 at 1:12pm - kids - by brooke (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found a bug under my foreskin. FML

#19318409
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29063) - you deserved it (18992)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:50am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

#19301577
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27305) - you deserved it (2594)

On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26473) - you deserved it (4419)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

#19293533
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33859) - you deserved it (9317)

On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother and I went to a meeting at my school about a camping trip the students in my grade will be going on. When the time to ask questions came, my mother raised her hand and loudly asked, "What if my child is on their period during the trip?" FML

#19281445
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31206) - you deserved it (2012)

On 03/15/2012 at 3:49am - misc - by Bebefer - United States (California)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML

#19279551
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33759) - you deserved it (2441)

On 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm - misc - by CallaC (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her huge, ex-Marine father took me out back, saying he wanted to show me something. That something was a machete. He savagely buried it in a tree stump and said, "Son, if you break my daughter's heart, that'll be your dick." FML

#19279132
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32830) - you deserved it (5845)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:06pm - intimacy - by PUA - United States (Georgia)

Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML

#19277345
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10138) - you deserved it (31461)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States

Today, I was chatting to a nice girl at the mall, and I said if she didn't get a raise, I would write to the management. She said they have no email address, and I replied that I meant an actual letter. "Like, on paper?" she said, "Damn, how old are ya, pops?" I want a ticket off this planet. FML

#19276990
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24842) - you deserved it (3022)

On 03/14/2012 at 11:17am - misc - by S. Michaels (man) - United States

Today, a Russian guy came up to me on the train and informed me that I look exactly like a typical Russian woman. He then went on to explain that I even had enough fat to survive their cold winters. FML

#19275863
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21703) - you deserved it (3825)

On 03/14/2012 at 2:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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