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Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML
I agree, your life sucks (54735) - you deserved it (7713)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55143) - you deserved it (3081)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44797) - you deserved it (5216)
On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I met the man of my dreams. We saw a movie, then went to a bar. It went perfectly, until he got wasted and started singing "Never Gonna Give You Up" to me while everyone laughed. Then I woke up, having just been Rickrolled by my own subconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29091) - you deserved it (4553)
On 03/12/2013 at 12:43pm - misc - by ShadowBox (man) - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19305) - you deserved it (36078)
On 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm - intimacy - by think i'm dating perdix (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24505) - you deserved it (1509)
On 01/16/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Kallian - United States
Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42264) - you deserved it (3420)
On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5598) - you deserved it (26971)
On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my dad asked me to clean the trash on our acreage. I was cleaning around the tree line when I came across a particularly heavy bag. I ran inside to ask my dad for help moving it. He looked inside the bag to see what it could be. It was a human body. Someone had thrown it over our fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48618) - you deserved it (1786)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28460) - you deserved it (4131)
On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21837) - you deserved it (4939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 09/21/2012 at 7:31am - misc - by minibuch1505 - Sent from mobile version
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29456) - you deserved it (3961)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8035) - you deserved it (52832)
On 07/30/2011 at 12:38am - animals - by loser4life - United States (Colorado)
Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33008) - you deserved it (4819)
On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21994) - you deserved it (4567)
On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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