About squirrellyy : I'm a blogger and a cat lover.
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Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42498) - you deserved it (11286)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I tried on a new perfume. When my boyfriend hugged me, he commented that I smelled like his mom. I don't know who was more surprised by the simultaneous bulge in his pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40673) - you deserved it (3225)
On 05/17/2013 at 3:21am - intimacy - by Uncomfortable (woman) -
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (78431) - you deserved it (4468)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (57572) - you deserved it (8165)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
I agree, your life sucks (48644) - you deserved it (9992)
On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38438) - you deserved it (4098)
On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28575) - you deserved it (94468)
Today, I overheard the guy I like talking to one of his friends about me. His friend asked if he and I were dating, to which he replied, "No way, dude. I have standards." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43777) - you deserved it (3708)
On 04/20/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom broke the news that my dad secretly got married two months ago, to a woman he has been dating for 15 years, and that my parents have actually been divorced for 12 years. They just lied about it this whole time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55013) - you deserved it (3081)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by too young for this (woman) - United States
Today, my English teacher used the word "interpretate" again. This isn't the only mistake she's made though; I've been so frustrated that I've started a list of them. It's over a page long. I'm meant to be learning things from this woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27460) - you deserved it (2551)
On 04/09/2013 at 7:09pm - work - by Annoyed Student - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40623) - you deserved it (4301)
On 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32280) - you deserved it (7299)
On 04/08/2013 at 5:17am - intimacy - by dancekat (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while at a hospital, a prayer group circled me and started praying that God and the good doctors and nurses would heal me from the disease that disfigured my face. I was there to visit my sick grandmother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41130) - you deserved it (2825)
On 04/08/2013 at 2:12am - health - by chinatownhobo (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)
Today, the people fixing my phone called to say that for some reason, my phone's SIM card has wiped all my contacts except for four, and they are doing their best to try and recover the rest. I had to explain to them that I only had four contacts to begin with. The guy laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34038) - you deserved it (3730)
On 03/31/2013 at 3:00am - misc - by Mr.no contacts (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29485) - you deserved it (3578)
On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)
Monday 20 May 2013
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