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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24757) - you deserved it (15689) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3729) - you deserved it (47764)
On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I got banned from my boyfriend's house for being an "insurance liability." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13107) - you deserved it (2765)
On 02/18/2010 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26513) - you deserved it (6407)
On 02/17/2010 at 3:15am - health - by Daddy. (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, conveniently naked myself. He disapproved, scratching my man-parts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with a blood infection, swollen nuts, and an hole in my butt where I had to get a shot of antibiotics. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11966) - you deserved it (50384)
On 09/03/2009 at 3:55pm - health - by keeperstride (man) - United States (California)
Today, I posted a status update on Facebook about how much I liked the Season Finale of NBC's "Heroes". My hand slipped to the right and it came out as "I really love Herpes. It's much better than everyone says it is". I didn't notice for few hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17712) - you deserved it (29400)
On 08/24/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by NotThatKind (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40097) - you deserved it (123071)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7075) - you deserved it (46038)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7075) - you deserved it (46038)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out my husband had bought my 1-year-old daughter a shirt that says "Birth Control Fail" in pink glittery letters. He even took her out in it while I was at work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52611) - you deserved it (5719)
On 08/14/2009 at 12:57pm - kids - by ohgod (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11337) - you deserved it (31740)
On 08/11/2009 at 11:34pm - kids - by SomeDJ (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, after selling their car, my parents decided to inform me that my car (that I paid for myself) is now going to be the "Family Car". They also informed me that since it is, after all, my car, I'll still have to pay for the gas and maintenance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71748) - you deserved it (3514)
On 08/10/2009 at 3:05pm - misc - by thanksforthat (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (82152) - you deserved it (2343)
On 08/09/2009 at 5:26am - misc - by redbluegreen (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43478) - you deserved it (5205)
On 08/07/2009 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by piratequeen (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, for our one year anniversary, my boyfriend decided to make me a patchwork blanket. The thing is, the patches were stains from bedsheets from where the 'wet spot' was. He thought it was romantic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43475) - you deserved it (4247)
On 07/22/2009 at 7:35pm - love - by OneYearMistake. (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)
Monday 20 May 2013
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