splitsides

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splitsides

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 June 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6242
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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splitsides's page activity

Visits<b>tagallopes</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:53pm<b>pumpkinpii</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 3:44am<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/09/2011 at 2:17am<b>ArrowOfTruth</b> - the 09/13/2011 at 6:57pm<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:13pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 07/24/2011 at 11:46pm<b>timberwolf800</b> - the 07/20/2011 at 2:02pm<b>BABTcakes</b> - the 05/03/2011 at 5:49pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:51am<b>hosscat74</b> - the 12/12/2010 at 3:56am<b>astm</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 9:06am<b>green_eyes124</b> - the 09/20/2010 at 2:54am<b>oxoashleeoxo</b> - the 08/25/2010 at 10:47pm<b>fisheatsbear</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 3:06am<b>krissytina</b> - the 06/14/2010 at 12:43pm<b>TaterSalad187</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 7:07pm<b>ElMundio87</b> - the 11/26/2009 at 1:35pm

splitsides's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of splitsides's badges

splitsides's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

by lostforwords / 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm / Ireland (Tipperary) / Miscellaneous

Today, while using the restroom at McDonald's, a hand reached under my stall and took the remaining toilet paper. FML

by ewww / 07/30/2011 at 10:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ran out of gas while driving, and had to call a tow truck. I drive a tow truck. FML

by j / 07/25/2011 at 10:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

by tony456 / 07/11/2011 at 5:08pm / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

by beekeke45 / 06/25/2011 at 9:39am / United States (New Hampshire) / Kids

Today, I missed my flight because I was held in airport security because I'd "threatened" an employee. He had confiscated my eyelash curler and jokingly I asked if he thought I was going to curl him to death. He didn't laugh. FML

by missy / 06/15/2011 at 10:42pm / United States (Alaska) / Transportation

Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML

by MegaBear / 06/15/2011 at 1:46am / United States / Work

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

by notinthebutt / 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, my boss asked if he could pay me in guns. FML

by grant b / 06/09/2011 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

by zain / 06/04/2011 at 2:15am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my doctor told me I have tennis elbow in both arms. I don't play tennis, I just have way too much free time. FML

by tomuchtime / 06/02/2011 at 4:46am / Intimacy

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2011 at 7:21am / Intimacy

Today, while tanning on a family cruise, I woke up to a crowd of people staring at me in disgust. Apparently, I'd fallen asleep, developed a boner, and started french-kissing the air. I had to sit through both the surveillance tapes and a grand bollocking from security in the aftermath. FML

by f*cks_sake / 05/13/2011 at 7:07pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML

by Anonymous / 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm / United Kingdom (West Sussex) / Animals

Today, an unpaid intern had his first day at my workplace of seven years. As a joke, my boss gave him the same challenge she gave me on my first day. The intern completed it in 37 minutes. We've always been told it's impossible. Guess we all have to start working harder. FML

by 19apollo91 / 05/09/2011 at 1:33pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.