splitsides

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splitsides

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 June 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6382
  • Number of comments : 101
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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splitsides's page activity

Visits<b>tagallopes</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 9:53pm<b>pumpkinpii</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 3:44am<b>Mornai</b> - the 11/09/2011 at 2:17am<b>ArrowOfTruth</b> - the 09/13/2011 at 6:57pm<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:13pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 07/24/2011 at 11:46pm<b>timberwolf800</b> - the 07/20/2011 at 2:02pm<b>BABTcakes</b> - the 05/03/2011 at 5:49pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 3:51am<b>hosscat74</b> - the 12/12/2010 at 3:56am<b>astm</b> - the 10/21/2010 at 9:06am<b>green_eyes124</b> - the 09/20/2010 at 2:54am<b>oxoashleeoxo</b> - the 08/25/2010 at 10:47pm<b>fisheatsbear</b> - the 06/18/2010 at 3:06am<b>krissytina</b> - the 06/14/2010 at 12:43pm<b>TaterSalad187</b> - the 05/04/2010 at 7:07pm<b>ElMundio87</b> - the 11/26/2009 at 1:35pm

splitsides's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of splitsides's badges

splitsides's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

by Jesus / 09/26/2011 at 10:03pm / Canada (Quebec) / Health

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

by FullOfNick / 09/10/2011 at 3:11am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working alone in the office with my brother. He's run out of work to do, so has been singing Disney songs loudly and badly, throwing stationery at me, and just now snuck up on me from behind and wrapped duct tape round my face. It's just us in the office next week. FML

by whyarewerelated / 09/08/2011 at 11:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

by Stuck / 09/08/2011 at 6:00am / United States / Health

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

by -- / 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I spent thirty minutes in the shower trying to remove "Pierre", a face complete with moustache that my girlfriend drew in sharpie on the tip of my cock. FML

by Anonymous / 08/31/2011 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Intimacy

Today, I tried to back out of a spot in a parking garage. I did a 12 point turn, hit the car behind me and still didn't manage to get out of the spot. Everyone was staring at me, and the attendant had to come over and move my car for me. I have to park there every day. FML

by greatdriver...4 / 08/31/2011 at 7:07am / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

by W1D0 / 08/20/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML

by froggylicious / 08/16/2011 at 2:18pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

by creepedoutlady / 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my family dragged me to an Alien-themed museum. They're convinced they were once abducted and felt up by creatures from outer space. They talk, and spend all their money, on nothing else. I'm hungry. FML

by Help / 08/13/2011 at 7:21pm / United States / Geek

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals