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splice520's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML
by pigeons_suck / 05/11/2011 at 5:17pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/17/2011 at 11:12pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by fourfootnine / 03/07/2011 at 8:47am / United States (Texas) / Kids
Today, I went to school in my brand new shirt. It was loose fitting and a bit thin, so I wore a sweatshirt on top, intending to take it in once inside. When I got to my seat, I took off my sweatshirt, but also took off my shirt with it, flashing my whole class. FML
by Amanda Ross / 11/18/2010 at 6:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
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- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort… Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle… Today, I found out that when I orgasm, my increased heart rate causes me to pass out. I also found…