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splice520

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splice520
  • Town/Country : fresh meadows, new york, united states
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 April 1987 (26 years)
  • Number of visits : 200
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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splice520's favorite FMLs

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

#17139539
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9041) - you deserved it (35845)

On 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus. More specifically, I discovered what it feels like to get a ruptured sinus from being hit in the face by a pigeon that was deflected from the windscreen of a van moving at about 35mph. FML

#16131734
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24177) - you deserved it (2127)

On 05/11/2011 at 5:17pm - health - by pigeons_suck (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML

#15828645
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33296) - you deserved it (5971)

On 04/17/2011 at 11:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41847) - you deserved it (6429)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I discovered that I'm short enough to be legally considered a midget. My daughter now wants to bring me to school for show and tell. FML

#15227856
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33808) - you deserved it (3005)

On 03/07/2011 at 8:47am - kids - by fourfootnine (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to school in my brand new shirt. It was loose fitting and a bit thin, so I wore a sweatshirt on top, intending to take it in once inside. When I got to my seat, I took off my sweatshirt, but also took off my shirt with it, flashing my whole class. FML

#13889988
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20856) - you deserved it (8249)

On 11/18/2010 at 6:12pm - misc - by Amanda Ross - United States (Maryland)



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