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speedman

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speedman's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time. Their justification for giving me up for adoption was that I wasn't conceived at the ideal time for them. Apparently, the ideal time was six months after the adoption, when they conceived the first of my two brothers. FML

#19830019
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30094) - you deserved it (1886)

On 06/22/2012 at 5:13pm - kids - by pon-3 (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I have been pissing blood for 2 hours, ever since some douche in a Nixon mask ran up and slugged me in the kidney. FML

#17981728
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32346) - you deserved it (2076)

On 10/14/2011 at 11:09am - health - by Nixontones - United States (Illinois)

Today, while changing a light bulb, I was electrocuted. I screamed before I blacked out. My entire family was home and heard me scream, but didn't come and check because they were too busy watching Glee. FML

#16122609
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41944) - you deserved it (6925)

On 05/10/2011 at 9:21pm - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (New York)



Caroline Maerten's illustrated FML

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  • It's a brand new Valentine's day, so here's a brand new blog section. Yep, you read that right, we're using the fact that Valentine's day is vaguely a controversial…

Friday 13 February 2015

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