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Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I was operating on a young girl, when she began to awake during the surgery. We quickly put her back under, of course, but now I'm terrified that she'll remember my profuse cursing and get me in the shit with my curmudgeonly killjoy of a boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15362) - you deserved it (7352)
On 06/03/2012 at 4:27pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, in a parking lot, a girl came up to our car and started to knock on the window and scream, "I KNEW IT!" My girlfriend doesn't believe that I don't know her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21650) - you deserved it (1446)
On 06/03/2012 at 11:20am - misc - by Apissedoffguy - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24853) - you deserved it (3941)
On 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by namenlos (man) - Australia
Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36990) - you deserved it (3014)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)
Today, I was having dinner with my college friends to celebrate the end of our first year. I said really great things about them as individuals. The only thing they had to say to me was, "Thanks for being the token black friend." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17357) - you deserved it (1953)
On 05/14/2012 at 10:23pm - misc - by foreverbrown (man) - United States
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48304) - you deserved it (2257)
On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33508) - you deserved it (2675)
On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon
Today, I got a one-inch fish bone stuck in my throat. I went to the doctor, who claimed he couldn't see the long white thing embedded next to my tonsil. He charged me $70, and told me to eat some bread. I had to pull it out myself with a pair of tweezers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23493) - you deserved it (1530)
On 04/17/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by Merlin - United States (Connecticut)
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9702) - you deserved it (39870) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France
Today, I found out that my partner thinks love is more meaningful than sex, so it's okay to stick his penis in someone else. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27186) - you deserved it (2466)
On 04/12/2012 at 4:42pm - intimacy - by Munkeh (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, my ex-husband officially became my step dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (73915) - you deserved it (3028)
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22673) - you deserved it (2206)
On 04/02/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I flew to Florida with my grandma. She tried to go through airport security with a pocket knife in her backpack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15276) - you deserved it (1177)
On 03/29/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by yelyah - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15089) - you deserved it (8038)
On 03/16/2012 at 4:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, my fiancé came home drunk with some girl. Then he told her that I was his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33320) - you deserved it (2414)
On 03/16/2012 at 6:38am - love - by elisabeth_pwnes - Norway (Vestfold)
Monday 20 May 2013
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