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sparklemuffin's favorite FMLs
by Lee / 04/09/2012 at 11:50pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 12:01pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
by Laura / 03/20/2012 at 6:27pm / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/24/2011 at 1:06am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by bob / 09/11/2011 at 11:15am / United States (New Mexico) / Health
by Bill Harrison / 07/19/2011 at 11:19am / United States / Work
by Devon / 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/27/2011 at 12:41pm / Ireland / Love
Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML
by Romantic / 01/15/2010 at 3:33am / United States (Florida) / Love
by screwwyou / 09/27/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML
by itisthedude / 09/10/2009 at 7:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by BW / 06/07/2009 at 5:49pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML
by helloitsbrian6969 / 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I decided to sink low enough to sign up for one of those 'get paid for taking a survey site'… Today, I pulled an unconscious woman from a burning truck. The moment I met her, she and her family… Today, I went out to get a coffee while there was a flash flood warning. On my way home I noticed…