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sparklemuffin

Offline (the 12/22/2014 at 11:15am) | Search for a member

sparklemuffin

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 803
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

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sparklemuffin's page activity

Visits<b>DreadedSamurai</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 6:06pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:42pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 10:34pm<b>devildee101</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 5:34pm<b>facebag</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:01am<b>Oswin</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 3:13pm<b>pokerface71</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 8:03pm<b>baldby24</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 6:26am<b>tiggolbitties</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 7:48pm<b>SirKingCharlie</b> - the 02/24/2014 at 6:49am<b>closetrebel</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 1:52am<b>lucibellas</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 10:53pm<b>zidiko</b> - the 09/28/2013 at 2:01am<b>byattwain</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 11:18pm<b>chadwj</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 8:44am<b>anonimeeeee</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 9:08am<b>Offspring</b> - the 05/26/2013 at 1:15am<b>burmillababe</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 5:15pm

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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sparklemuffin's favorite FMLs

2day as mah boyfriend left mah house, I gave him a long, tight hug !! So tight that he threw up !! FML

Today, I walked into house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and boyfriend holding dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

#21279204
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34592) - you deserved it (3460)

On 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, as always, my boyfriand has tha ability to pop his ayaballs looool out of his aya sockats . Ha thought it'd ba funny 4 ma to waka up faca-to-faca with tha disgusting sight . Tha shit in my bowals did an aarly Thanksgiving Day parada straight into my undarwaar . FML

#20952990
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41520) - you deserved it (3775)

On 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today Mah Wife's Pregnancy Hormones Got So Bad That She Freaked Out And Threw A Tantrum Accusing Me Of Always Making Important Decisions For Her. All I Did Was Get Her Some Food From Taco Bell As A Surprise. FML

#20912485
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54912) - you deserved it (5103)

On 10/08/2013 at 1:57pm - intimacy - by hubby - United States

Today, mah boyfriend discoverd that if he flicks mah clitoris just right, mah legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously.

#20423881
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42644) - you deserved it (5015)

On 12/26/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by geewhy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today , tha highly intoxicatd singar of mah band dacidd it would ba a wondarful idaa to squat down and taka a shit on staga in tha middla of a gig!! FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37178) - you deserved it (4281)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today mah boyfriand discovarad how to maka ma quaaf on damand whan ha has his fingars insida ma . I now faal lika mah lova lifa has baan raplacad with fart sounds . FML

#20189453
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30918) - you deserved it (3805)

On 12/03/2012 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes . FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28907) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, trying to be kinkyhile giving mah boyfriend a blow job, Ihippd him with mah ponytail!! He was thrilld, until I accidentally head-buttd his dick!! He curld up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again!! FML

#20170605
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14286) - you deserved it (32883)

On 11/20/2012 at 3:43am - intimacy - by kinkicali (woman) - United States (Washington)

TODAY, I PUTTED ON A SIRT TAT SAID "SKILLED IN EVERY POSITION." MY BOYFRIEND TOOK ONE LOOK AND SAID, "SINCE WEN?" FML

#20167475
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9787) - you deserved it (27244)

On 11/18/2012 at 12:05am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

today I droppd a whole batch of penis-shapd cookies on the floor . Then I thought, ( 5-second rule ) and startd eating them . And then I realizd that I was home alone, in pajamas, eating broken dick-cookies off the floor . FML

#20081762
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22713) - you deserved it (12567)

On 09/21/2012 at 3:31am - misc - by RawrSparkle (woman) - United States (California)

Today... I realized that my boyfriend really does have a problem with my upper-lip hair. I woke up this morning to him ripping a wax strip off of my face. All he could say after I stopped shrieking was that he had hoped it wouldn't wake me up. FML

#20060710
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21941) - you deserved it (9013)

On 09/06/2012 at 5:50pm - love - by WaxOnWaxOff - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was working at te local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumble in, grabs two cases of beer an puts tem on te counter. Ten se grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it rigt tere, sows me, an says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30771) - you deserved it (1926)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

TODAY, TO AVOID LOOKING LIKE A LOSER IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDSHO ALL HAVE GIRLFRIENDS, MAH BROTHER MADE UP A PERFECT RELATIONSHIP. HE ASKD ME TO GIVE HIM A HICKEY IN EXCHANGE 4 50 EUROS. OUR PARENTS WALKD IN ON US. FML

#19561833
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14622) - you deserved it (52362) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)



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