softball_nerd_24

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Offline (the 02/08/2015 at 10:45pm)

softball_nerd_24

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1051
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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softball_nerd_24's page activity

Visits<b>illegalbeagle69</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 8:44pm

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softball_nerd_24's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2014 at 1:52pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Kids

Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

by Meowit / 09/06/2014 at 11:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, I found out I'm allergic to our new cat. My mom said she'd rather get rid of me than the cat. FML

Today, it was my great aunt's funeral. We all had to wait two hours for the service to begin, because they forgot to dig the grave. FML

by abbshows / 08/29/2014 at 2:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

by ch4nny / 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, after a long silent and awkward pause after asking my girlfriend's dad if I can take her on holiday for Christmas, he looked me dead in the eyes and said "No, you may not impregnate my daughter." FML

by Dafuq happen there / 08/23/2014 at 3:34am / South Africa / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

by confidence taken / 08/23/2014 at 2:26am / United States (Mississippi) / Intimacy

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

by royallymessedup / 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm / Love

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm / New Zealand / Kids

Today, my elderly mother explained that, "I don't need my glasses to drive, I just need them to see." FML

by scared / 08/03/2014 at 8:47pm / Canada / Transportation

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I walked in on my 15-year-old daughter stripping on Skype for strangers. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2014 at 1:39pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I woke up to my dog jumping on my bed and licking me all over. It would've been fine, if I hadn't woken the first time a few minutes earlier to the sight of him going to town on his balls. FML

by ballbreath / 07/16/2014 at 11:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I went to fill out my time sheet. Someone had edited it, and now it suddenly ends August 22nd. I think I'm getting fired. FML

by smpenn89 / 07/16/2014 at 10:26am / United States (Ohio) / Work

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