soccerhunnii9023

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soccerhunnii9023

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1736
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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soccerhunnii9023's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:05pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 8:11am<b>BunnyEars</b> - the 10/10/2009 at 7:54pm<b>IN5AN3</b> - the 07/15/2009 at 10:48am<b>_Noon_</b> - the 07/12/2009 at 11:56am<b>IrishDancer93</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 5:51pm<b>jenn03</b> - the 06/27/2009 at 1:12am<b>Evilbeagle</b> - the 06/23/2009 at 4:23am<b>Xero3g</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 7:21pm<b>redbluegreen</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 2:35pm<b>podrummer9209</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 2:30pm<b>ayebailey</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 11:23am<b>Arcterion</b> - the 06/07/2009 at 6:21pm<b>Rikuarf8</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 7:21pm<b>jen_kay</b> - the 05/09/2009 at 11:51am<b>rukusrazor</b> - the 05/05/2009 at 3:35pm<b>ArtsySwag</b> - the 05/03/2009 at 8:20pm<b>grazynaanka</b> - the 04/30/2009 at 5:03am

soccerhunnii9023's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

soccerhunnii9023's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter turned 11. Since she LOVES Harry Potter, I decided to write her an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. When she saw the letter, she screamed and showed me. When she found out I wrote it, she told me she hated me, started crying, and stepped on my foot. FML

by notawizard / 07/16/2009 at 6:16am / Spain (Catalonia) / Kids

Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML

by Jeweler / 06/26/2009 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About half way through I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML

by rubmytummy / 06/10/2009 at 5:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I picked up my 4-year-old daughter from day care. As we're driving home, a butterfly lands on the windshield. Just as my daughter comments on how pretty the butterfly is, I turned a corner and accidentally hit the windshield wipers and smeared the pretty butterfly across the windshield. FML

by reb2632 / 05/29/2009 at 4:13pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML

by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love

Today, I was at a party, and I sat down on a chair. While conversing with friends, I shifted places on the chair, and broke it. Embarrassed, I then stood up and change chairs. After moving to the next chair, I broke that one too. FML

by alsayslegit / 05/25/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

by helloitsbrian6969 / 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a phone call from a number I didn't recognize. It was a man with a speech impediment, and I began imitating him. He was the manager of a store I applied at. He wanted to arrange an interview. FML

by oopsie / 05/24/2009 at 10:50am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was kneeling down at work to do some cleaning. My co-worker said, "Oh don't your knees hurt, kneeling like that for so long?" Without thinking how it sounded, I said, "Oh no, it's not a problem. I'm on my knees all the time." He's yet to stop hitting on me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 2:43am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was kneeling down at work to do some cleaning. My co-worker said, "Oh don't your knees hurt, kneeling like that for so long?" Without thinking how it sounded, I said, "Oh no, it's not a problem. I'm on my knees all the time." He's yet to stop hitting on me. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 2:43am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2009 at 3:11pm / Italy (Toscana) / Health

Today, I got a call from my child's preschool saying that "Mindy keeps saying she sits on her daddy's lap and plays with his peter." My daughter meant 'puter, as in computer. Now the school is worried my husband is a child molester. FML

by Gumfanatic302 / 05/06/2009 at 9:43pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, I pissed my younger brother off. Seemingly unrelated to this was the fact that I left my laptop on in my room along with MSN signed into my email adress. Now, all my contacts know that I apparently "just love the warm feeling of semen sliding down my throat". FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 5:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML

by Aether / 05/03/2009 at 5:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Transportation