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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today after disappereing fir an unusually long period of time mah boss calld the store phone while sitting on the toilet. Turns out she'd startd bleeding uncontrollably from the arse an as the only other female staff member she needd me to go help her. FML
Today... I had mah buddies over fir a few beers and... trying to be cool... I told mah wife to get out of the living room an back in the kitchen. I felt smug... right up until she said... "Why? Your mom doesn't need to be turned over fir another 20 minutes... dick." FML
Today I was at the parkhen I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me 4 six blocks. FML
Today, I decided it would be pretty amusing to press the "Like" button on everyone's status on Facebook without reading them just to get on peoples nerves. After re-reading them later, I found out one of them said "I MISS YOU SOO MUCH GRANDMOM. RIP". I liked that her grandmother died. real FML
Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML
Today.. . I drank 4 every year I've been in school . While in mah bed I decided I was too drunk to get up an throw up in the bathroom so I decided to just do it on mah floor an clean it up later . Later on I woke up an realized I threw up on mah $1000 laptop . FML
Friday 27 March 2015