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slyace

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slyace
  • Town/Country : New York, USA!!!
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 January 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 1443
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About slyace : Boredom manifested -__-

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slyace's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a lady who had fainted. I ran over to help, only to find out that she was unstable and had a knife in her hand. She was pointing it at me, and growled threateningly every time I tried to move away. It took the cops an hour to defuse the situation. FML

#20484368
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31625) - you deserved it (2255)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:48am - misc - by thegirlofthedad (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27254) - you deserved it (2369)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
215 comments

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

#18966203
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21687) - you deserved it (4836)

On 02/01/2012 at 1:13am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

#17773811
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30027) - you deserved it (15035)

On 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm - misc - by ohgodwhy - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML

Today, I was helping clean my grandpa's garage when I found some of his old election posters from the '50s. They included slogans such as, "Dick: you know it feels right" and "Want growth? Choose Dick." I'm not sure whether to be disgusted or impressed. FML

#17279382
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24365) - you deserved it (3977)

On 07/27/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML

#17156963
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35727) - you deserved it (3159)

On 07/18/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10612) - you deserved it (105575)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10612) - you deserved it (105575)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend blew up at me for a comment I had made several weeks ago about not wanting kids. Then, she told me that she's pregnant. After consoling her and telling her that whatever we do, we'll do it together, she further explained that she's not sure if it's mine. FML

#8841387
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31795) - you deserved it (2746)

On 03/05/2010 at 7:54am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML

#8140774
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4301) - you deserved it (20494)

On 02/11/2010 at 7:47pm - misc - by SummersEve (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got mauled by a cat named Mr. Sprinkles. FML

#7989901
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22871) - you deserved it (4995)

On 02/07/2010 at 10:19pm - animals - by zzdug (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that, if timed just right, the alarm function on my phone can be disabled by a text message. And my dad has an impeccable sense of timing. I was 20 minutes late for work. FML

#7974349
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21681) - you deserved it (2679)

On 02/07/2010 at 1:58pm - work - by Ishii (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML

#7773873
409 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101021) - you deserved it (11753)

On 02/01/2010 at 5:23am - misc - by doesnttastegood (woman) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)



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