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slowlybreakingme

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slowlybreakingme

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4827
  • Number of comments : 130
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

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slowlybreakingme's page activity

Visits<b>hare</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 3:45pm<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 2:38pm<b>roadrunner06</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:43pm<b>Vita_1</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:56am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 10:51am<b>2i1337i2iscore</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:12am<b>steeler088</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 8:33am<b>funkybee</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 11:46pm<b>xavier5529</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 11:42am<b>zeriously95</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 2:29am<b>rjt93</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 12:49pm<b>PastelPotatoes</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:16pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 10:54am<b>thisguy184</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 6:38pm<b>Garrett2818</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 5:05pm<b>Zeus1070</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 8:43pm<b>klc20071989</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 10:18am<b>Already_Dead</b> - the 03/14/2014 at 7:56pm

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slowlybreakingme's favorite FMLs

Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

#20001897
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21189) - you deserved it (3660)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:35am - misc - by llaurenmariee - United States

Today, I learned that when you hear a bump in the night, it's best not to check your parents' room. Some things cannot be unseen. FML

#20001682
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14708) - you deserved it (19083)

On 08/04/2012 at 2:56am - misc - by alyssabree42 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26016) - you deserved it (12367)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML

#19840064
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22779) - you deserved it (1645)

On 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by Boar - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42798) - you deserved it (3916)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML

#19801481
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10502) - you deserved it (23036)

On 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm - misc - by kitty shah - United States

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

#19799691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23059) - you deserved it (10575)

On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37155) - you deserved it (3996)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I tried to go to the gym, but I ended up watching cat videos on YouTube for three hours. FML

#19791305
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9731) - you deserved it (34342)

On 06/15/2012 at 7:27am - health - by latino14 - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at the mall with my friend. A lady came up to us and told my friend that she could be a model. Then the lady looked at me and said, "Oh... Nice shoes." FML

#19790589
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23385) - you deserved it (2213)

On 06/15/2012 at 1:54am - misc - by Rose (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I volunteered at a soup kitchen. During the rounds, a grisly but nice young fellow told me that I had beautiful eyes. I was quite touched; that is until he leaned in and added, "Can I have them for my collection?" FML

#19777133
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24595) - you deserved it (1713)

On 06/12/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I talked to my father for the first time in several years. I proudly told him that I have been attending Beauty School. He looked me up and down and said, "Doesn't look like you've learned much." FML

#19772636
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22227) - you deserved it (2701)

On 06/11/2012 at 7:39pm - misc - by beautyschool22 (woman) - United States

Today, I texted my friend and asked her what her sad status on Facebook was about. She texted me back saying her step-mother had passed away. I tried to reply with "awwh" but my phone autocorrected it to "ahaha." FML

#19687154
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30211) - you deserved it (6862)

On 05/27/2012 at 3:19am - misc - by iPhonekid - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandmother was driving me to the mall. Suddenly, she stopped in the middle of the road. When I asked her what exactly she was doing, she said, "Oh, am I driving?" FML

#19685712
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25477) - you deserved it (1806)

On 05/26/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by anonymus - Canada (Ontario)



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