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slooby

Offline (the 10/05/2014 at 4:56pm) | Search for a member

slooby

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4525
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About slooby : You don't fool me, Effy Stonem

slooby's page activity

Visits<b>that70sshow1223</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 2:09am<b>kayzers</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 10:36pm<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:32pm<b>slimblack</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 1:47am<b>Awesomoroboto</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 6:50pm<b>max2732</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 10:03am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:02am<b>eregem</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 6:59am<b>RandEm2497</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 12:34am<b>DabangG12</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 3:24pm<b>grilakuddy</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:21pm<b>roza_and_dimka</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 9:21pm<b>kellyb1094</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 8:16pm<b>disbejessica</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:46pm<b>julako</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:00pm<b>tambo5135</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:50pm<b>almightyteapot</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 4:04pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 3:28pm

slooby's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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slooby's favorite FMLs

Today, I refused to go down on my boyfriend of 9 months. He then shoved me off the couch and, half crying, yelled that I was the third girl this week to turn him down. After sobbing for a bit, he looked me in the eyes and said, "I need you to do this so I can prove my manhood." FML

#20581880
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68561) - you deserved it (10887)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:05am - intimacy - by saywhat (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the people fixing my phone called to say that for some reason, my phone's SIM card has wiped all my contacts except for four, and they are doing their best to try and recover the rest. I had to explain to them that I only had four contacts to begin with. The guy laughed. FML

#20567905
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39921) - you deserved it (5180)

On 03/31/2013 at 3:00am - misc - by Mr.no contacts (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She didn't say no, she didn't faint, and she didn't cry. She just stared at me blankly and said, "But... why...?" FML

#20566302
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43111) - you deserved it (3621) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/29/2013 at 9:29pm - love - by Badam - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I came home from work to my 4-year old daughter cussing left and right. I asked her about it; she said that her brother had taught her some words. When I confronted him about the situation, he kicked my shin and screamed, "Stop treating me like a fucking child!" He's 5. FML

#20564455
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39637) - you deserved it (16937)

On 03/28/2013 at 9:13pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML

#20562509
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (5530)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

Today, I came home from a relaxing, peaceful vacation. When I got home my 4-year-old son was free-balling with poop all over his body, screaming "Bob the Builder will kick your ass." The baby sitter is nowhere to be found and I can't get him to stop saying, "I love ass." FML

#20562056
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41033) - you deserved it (5321)

On 03/27/2013 at 4:00am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, it was raining heavily so I wore my black poncho as I walked to work. On the way there I noticed an old and seemingly homeless man following me. I turned around to confront him. He picked up a stick and screamed "Expecto Patronum!" Apparently I look like a dementor. FML

#20558527
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31268) - you deserved it (5894)

On 03/24/2013 at 8:23pm - misc - by Anna L. - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

#20556322
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51467) - you deserved it (6243)

On 03/23/2013 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

#20556205
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43551) - you deserved it (3230)

On 03/23/2013 at 9:25am - kids - by kindergarten teacher - United States (California)

Today, I found out my mom thought I was a lesbian because I dated a girl in high school. I didn't date anyone in high school. Apparently, guys never asked me out because my best friend told everyone that I was her girlfriend. I had a two-year lesbian relationship that I never knew about. FML

#20554170
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47436) - you deserved it (3172)

On 03/21/2013 at 8:35pm - love - by SmallAngel (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up to my cat giving birth, on my bed. I adopted her from a friend, who told me she was spayed. Now I have a giant mess and a cat who won't let me move either her or her babies. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch for a while. FML

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

#20553379
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37795) - you deserved it (19386)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML

#20553362
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38484) - you deserved it (16421)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:01am - intimacy - by meeee (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend still won't talk to me, after I caused him the "worst embarrassment" of his life in front of his friends. What did I do wrong? I joined their conversation and ended up confusing the fictional characters of Gollum and Yoda with one another. FML

#20545430
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15954) - you deserved it (57757) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2013 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Centre)

Today, I held hands with the boy I like. Without thinking, I commented that his right hand is softer, as if he only used lotion on that one hand. And then we stood there in terribly awkward silence. FML

#20541635
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41788) - you deserved it (15695)

On 03/13/2013 at 12:57am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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