slooby

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/24/2016 at 6:52am)

slooby

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8144
  • Number of comments : 200
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About slooby : You don't fool me, Effy Stonem

slooby's page activity

Visits<b>Aubs3993</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 8:25pm<b>grajax</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 3:37am<b>DKING123456789</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 9:13am<b>completenonsense</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 5:42pm<b>BrooklynGirl36</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 5:42pm<b>TheInitiator</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 9:44am<b>RealChewyPiano</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 2:24am<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 5:39pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 9:41am<b>turtles_yup</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 8:20pm<b>starlandmarie</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 3:20pm<b>Jackimo98</b> - the 03/05/2016 at 9:52pm<b>PopBlox</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 10:11pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 1:46pm<b>maddymarie123</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 5:25pm<b>syki</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 4:33pm<b>badbitch23</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 1:01am<b>lightningclicks</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 10:23pm

Fucked!<b>Xx_Slayer_xX</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 11:39pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 5:08pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 3:22am<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:06pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 6:07am

slooby's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of slooby's badges

slooby's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

by FenRackety / 05/10/2013 at 8:37am / Canada / Animals

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:59am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbours' whiny emo of a daughter got dumped by her boyfriend. In her infinite wisdom, she's chosen to cope by playing on her recorder the worst rendition of "My Heart Will Go On" that I've ever heard. It's been going on all day. Now I know why he dumped this idiot. FML

by Anonymous / 05/04/2013 at 5:44pm / United Kingdom (Liverpool) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

by prostitott / 05/04/2013 at 3:22am / Kids

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

by future brain bleach addict / 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my sister texted me, saying she was about to go into surgery. It's been a long time coming, and we've both been worried about what could happen. I texted "good luck" back. My phone autocorrected it to "goodbye" and I didn't even notice. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2013 at 12:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my wedding day. I have a cold sore that makes me look like The Joker. Make-up won't cover it and the emergency medicine my doctor gave me only irritates it more. My future husband asks, "Why so serious?" and laughs whenever he sees me. Fantastic. FML

by sharibaby / 04/30/2013 at 5:26pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, for a laugh, I put vanilla yogurt into a mayonnaise jar and went to the mall to eat it with a spoon. Too bad that someone called mall security on me for disturbing the peace. They shoved me into a back room and grilled me about what was in the jar. FML

by longsock123 / 04/30/2013 at 11:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh, did our first dance to LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" with stupid moves and everything. 200 guests. Nobody laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 6:29pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Love

Today, my school took part in a standardized state test. After finishing, I decided to take a nap, only to be awoken by the test monitor, who wanted me to leave. Apparently, I was ferociously farting in my sleep and was disturbing the people still taking the test. FML

by Skyler / 04/24/2013 at 3:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals

Today, I walked in on my brother giving his best friend a hand-job. I can't unsee this. FML

Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML

by lonely / 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm / United States / Love

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

by ironies a b*tch / 04/13/2013 at 1:04am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, I found out that my classmates hate me so much that they have a seating arrangement where people have to sit next to me on a rotating basis. A fight broke out yesterday because someone tried to skip their turn. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 4:21pm / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous