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sleepistheenemy's favorite FMLs
by musicthief / 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/01/2011 at 12:41am / United States / Animals
Today, my wife threw a piece of tofu cake at my head for suggesting that the money she'd spent on magic "healing" crystals and homeopathic "remedies" would've just as well been spent on a chocolate teapot. FML
by notabeliever / 07/29/2011 at 1:11am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, a business man in his forties tackled me to the ground in an attempt to take my seat on a crowded train. When that didn't work, he called me a fat bitch and gave me the finger. The seat was given up for me because I'm seven months pregnant. FML
by Anonymous / 07/07/2011 at 6:52pm / United Kingdom / Transportation
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- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I… Today, I was getting it on with my cute guy friend in his candlelit bedroom and we had just started… Today, I sent my main man a picture of the two of us out on our second date. He immediately added…