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Offline (the 12/02/2014 at 6:17pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4244
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About slapsface : I don't know what to say.... I play xbox

slapsface's page activity

Visits<b>Spudnik</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 6:03am<b>One_Way</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:20am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 12:17am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 1:45am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 4:05pm<b>Kyra1</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 12:47am<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 12:07am<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 6:18pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:53pm<b>JoelsLastNight</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 12:18pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 3:25pm<b>chamay</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 5:03pm<b>tom_willer67</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 3:27pm<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 12:12am<b>xXlike_a_G6Xx</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 10:40pm<b>maz95</b> - the 07/27/2013 at 6:33pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 3:08am<b>prongs54</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 2:17pm

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slapsface's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a family dinner. My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut for not wearing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", and then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me. No wonder I hardly ever visit these people. FML

by mel / 01/18/2013 at 6:18pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML

by dormeur / 01/18/2013 at 6:39am / Animals

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

by bull-stuff / 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm / United States (South Carolina) / Animals

Today, I was having a conversation with my mother during which I described something as being pungent. She thought I had made up the word, so I grabbed the dictionary to show her that I hadn't. She then became enraged, threw the dictionary at my head and told me never to talk to her again. FML

by Mizzaroo / 01/17/2013 at 1:38am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, due to technical problems, I had to call the company's IT-support as my computer went totally haywire. I explained via phone that I couldn't access anything. The support then tried contacting me by e-mail and got upset with me when I didn't answer. FML

by Beva / 01/17/2013 at 12:03am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Work

Today, I walked up sixteen flights of stairs to my room to avoid the lift lines. When I was almost to the top, the fire alarm sounded. FML

by tired / 01/16/2013 at 2:02pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother-in-law gave me a bottle of champagne for my birthday. This is the third year in a row she has done this. I'm a recovering alcoholic, and she's well aware of that fact. FML

by Ari / 01/16/2013 at 1:36am / Health

Today, I was walking out of my girlfriend's house with her when I saw her thong drying on the rack. I picked it up, sniffed it and put it on my face as a joke. She replied with, "Those are my mother's." FML

by Anonymous / 01/16/2013 at 12:52am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

by Bella / 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML

by Nightmare / 01/15/2013 at 9:41am / Kids

Today, both my brother and sister missed my wedding. She was playing in a Call of Duty tournament, and he got so high that he forgot about the wedding completely. He was my best man. FML

by What a happy day / 01/14/2013 at 12:36pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my child to the park. Having been there an hour, another mum came up to me and we started talking. She then told me that one kid had been harassing her children, pointing to my child. When she asked which one was mine I pointed to a random kid. It was hers. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 10:02am / Australia / Kids

Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML

by Kate / 12/23/2012 at 3:24am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended not to hear me. FML

by anonymous / 12/22/2012 at 7:50am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I had a look through my dad's girlfriend's phone she left on the table. Best part: I now know what I'm getting for christmas. Worst part: I now know my dad's favourite position. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2012 at 6:15am / Australia / Intimacy