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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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skittlezzidilzz

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skittlezzidilzz
  • Town/Country : Sharjah, United Arab Emirates
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 20 February 1996 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 246
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About skittlezzidilzz : I am a writer, I love books and music. FML is the best site EVER!!! oh, and www.notalwaysright.com is kinda like it, but about stupid customers.

skittlezzidilzz's last visitors

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skittlezzidilzz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating lunch out side with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#6795519 (68)

I agree, your life sucks (23243) - you deserved it (1685)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:43pm - animals - by ollierocks96 - United States (Florida)

Today, I got in an elevator at a hotel. Just as the door was closing, somebody banged into the door and stuck their hand through. I yelled, "What, are you retarded?!" The doors then opened to reveal a mentally handicapped boy with his parents standing behind him. FML

#6792235 (156)

I agree, your life sucks (8628) - you deserved it (31915)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:38am - misc - by Mike (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing with my yo-yo. I began showing off to my friends. When the girl I liked walked by, I thought it'd be really cool to do the move "dog bite". I ended hitting myself in the balls. Hard. FML

#6792186 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (4579) - you deserved it (21598)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:34am - misc - by owmyballs - Thailand (Krung Thep)

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

#6789867 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (5930) - you deserved it (26634)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:58am - animals - by AnRom (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. After a few minutes of conversing, he told me he didn't need to give me a ticket. He then asked for a date. I politely declined. After staring at me for a very long moment, he said "I think I'm going to have to give you that ticket after all." FML

#4255816 (203)

I agree, your life sucks (36637) - you deserved it (18561)

On 08/03/2009 at 1:53pm - misc - by WearingOff (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She has been there all day. FML

#4255105 (93)

I agree, your life sucks (36474) - you deserved it (2542)

On 08/03/2009 at 1:16pm - work - by Azcrazy (man) - United States

Today, I found out that the girl I tutored in high school in basic ENGLISH just received her PhD in Biophysics. I am now the manager of a McDonald's. I was also the Valedictorian of our graduating class. FML

#4253042 (234)

I agree, your life sucks (31534) - you deserved it (26396)

On 08/03/2009 at 11:08am - work - by MickeyDManager (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my co-worker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she goes to the manager and accuses me of sexual harassment. Everyone applauded. FML

#4252851 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (40181) - you deserved it (2393)

On 08/03/2009 at 10:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to my grandfathers' funeral. As I stood there, bawling my eyes out, my aunt came over and put her arm around me. She leaned her head close to mine. I assumed she was going to say something comforting, instead she asked where I'd bought my shoes from. FML

#4251374 (89)

I agree, your life sucks (33760) - you deserved it (1895)

On 08/03/2009 at 8:04am - misc - by whitneyy (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my 8 year old little sister said "f you" to my mom. My mom thought I told her to say that and grounded me for a month. Later, my sister came up to me and said "Gotcha, bitch." FML

#4158502 (124)

I agree, your life sucks (43469) - you deserved it (2490)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:11am - kids - by Toaster (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML

#4157203 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (30379) - you deserved it (2675)

On 07/30/2009 at 9:56am - kids - by Rae (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML

#4156027 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (44055) - you deserved it (2124)

On 07/30/2009 at 7:34am - kids - by Herdad (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was at the Wild Animal Park. There were bees everywhere. One brave bee, thinking he was Mr. Macho, flew right down my tank top in between my boobs. I freaked the hell out and ended up screaming and pulling down my shirt to get the bee out. I flashed about 10 kids and their families. FML

#4097129 (260)

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (6679)

On 07/28/2009 at 1:00am - kids - by bsaucedo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I wake up, switch on TV and the first thing I see is the picture of a wanted rapist who looks just like me. I’m afraid to leave home. FML

#8 (205)

I agree, your life sucks (170593) - you deserved it (14295)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi-online -