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Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 4 years. Her response? First, she threw up all over me and then she started crying hysterically. I'll take that as a no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19157) - you totally deserved it (1065)
On 11/12/2009 at 12:36am - love - by youmakemesick - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I drove 600 miles to be with my boyfriend of two years for his uncle's funeral. He didn't want me to come because I am seven months pregnant and flying is dangerous in the third trimester. When I got there I don't know who was more suprised to see me: him, his wife, or their kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43891) - you totally deserved it (2922)
On 11/08/2009 at 10:39am - love - by homewrecker - United States
Today, after a trip to my doctor I found out that my recent mood swings and hot flashes are the result of a hormonal imbalance that mimics the effects of menopause. I'm a 17 year old guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21048) - you totally deserved it (795)
On 11/07/2009 at 7:38pm - health - by oldlady (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my parents, who are divorced, were arguing over who has to pay for my bus pass. They decided they wouldn't pay unless the other one did too. Neither will pay the £60 it'll cost for my bus pass. I now have to walk to school every day, in freezing winter weather. It's 9 miles. Each way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27733) - you totally deserved it (2031)
On 11/04/2009 at 3:00pm - misc - by Walker (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I totalled my car. I flipped it over on the freeway and broke my collarbone in the process. I was in extreme pain and unable to move. It took the ambulance an hour to get there in rush hour traffic. The song repeating on my iPod was, "Don't Worry, be Happy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22606) - you totally deserved it (2835)
On 11/04/2009 at 12:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I got to my apartment early after being out really late the night before. Maybe next time I should call ahead of time so that my roommate has time to sneak my girlfriend out of his bedroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27685) - you totally deserved it (1309)
On 11/02/2009 at 6:05am - love - by ZPyRoGoDz (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was in minding my own business in bed in my dorm room. It was dark and my roommate came over, intending to slap my ass really hard. The problem is, I was lying face up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20342) - you totally deserved it (1217)
On 10/26/2009 at 2:32am - misc - by Jack - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was playing Farmville all day, and I was really into the game. I was getting phone calls all day, but I kept ignoring them cause I was making so much Farm Money. Come to find out it was my son's school. He fell off the jungle gym and broke his arm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2578) - you totally deserved it (58003)
On 10/24/2009 at 3:25am - kids - by stewhart (woman) - United States (Alabama)
Today, I missed my University entrance exam because of heavy traffic. I was stuck at one intersection for over an hour. The real kicker? It took me less than 10 minutes to drive home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19232) - you totally deserved it (1453)
On 10/22/2009 at 9:11am - misc - by roadrage (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I found out who the father of my sister's 4 year old son is. My husband of 7 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40293) - you totally deserved it (1466)
On 10/21/2009 at 2:31pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, some thug tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves and told a cop that I did it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35974) - you totally deserved it (1028)
On 10/20/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by BobbyHutchinson (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, I found out that if you let your son install a new shower head, he won't tighten it properly. So when you turn the shower on, it will shoot out at rocket speed, hitting you in the face. Then when you grab the shower handle to prevent yourself falling backwards, you will just rip that out and hit your head again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19556) - you totally deserved it (2474)
On 10/16/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by Ndanick1193 (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I learned that my car alarm only goes off if the car is unlocked a bit forcibly. Doesn't make a sound when some prick breaks the window out in the middle of the night to steal my cd player. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17652) - you totally deserved it (868)
On 10/16/2009 at 5:23am - misc - by Hardsleeper - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a funny prank to put duct tape on my eyes while I was sleeping so that when I woke up, I would be blind. I have no more eyelashes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24990) - you totally deserved it (1322)
On 10/16/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by xXx (man) - United States (California)
Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24400) - you totally deserved it (1049)
On 10/11/2009 at 12:48pm - misc - by prickly (man) - United States (Georgia)
