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Today, at work, a customer left their cell phone behind. I tried to see if there were any pictures so that I could identify them. No, I still don't know what they look like, but I have seen their penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18026) - you deserved it (12620)
On 12/08/2010 at 6:47am - intimacy - by khaelian -
Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18141) - you deserved it (4757)
On 12/04/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by chi-huaHUA - United States
Today, I walked outside to see my friend frantically waving and running at me, yelling something I couldn't understand. I smiled and started to jog over to him until I realized he was screaming "RUN!!!" We spent the next 10 minutes running from his neighbor's 5 vicious chihuahuas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18141) - you deserved it (4757)
On 12/04/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by chi-huaHUA - United States
Today, I was walking back to campus with my boyfriend when we passed an Irish pub called "Fat Belly's." He put his arm around me, patted my stomach, and said "Yay! It's your restaurant!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (20414) - you deserved it (4940)
On 11/14/2010 at 1:54pm - love - by freedomofmusic (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)
Today, I ran into a police officer while on my bike. It wouldn't be so bad, had he not been riding a massive horse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15165) - you deserved it (6287)
On 11/10/2010 at 2:58am - animals - by Kate - United States (Oregon)
Today, finishing up in the shower room, I walked into the kitchen to get a drink. Apparently both bathrooms were occupied and my grandmother really had to go... She was bent over in the kitchen peeing into a cup. I may never be able to erase this image. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20514) - you deserved it (1639)
On 10/18/2010 at 7:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)
Today, when I stopped at a light, I tossed a banana peel into a field along the side of the road. The man behind me got out of his car, picked up the banana peel and threw it back into my car at me. When I tried to tell him it was biodegradable, he told me to "stop making up words." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18984) - you deserved it (21680)
On 10/01/2010 at 9:47am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, I caught my husband modeling my cute floral panties. All he could manage to say was "I love you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21248) - you deserved it (3220)
On 10/01/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by canispankthat - United States (California)
Today, at work, I leaned back in a chair too far, causing me to tip over and smash my head into a wall. If that wasn't enough damage, my boss keeps replaying the security footage to everyone I work with. My head hurts not from the fall, but the loud laughter that keeps coming from inside the office. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9557) - you deserved it (13234)
On 09/10/2010 at 6:02am - work - by hard_headed (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I witnessed a series of nude old people cycling in the city. I was eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28235) - you deserved it (3720)
On 08/15/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by anonymous - Netherlands (Gelderland)
Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11905) - you deserved it (40403)
On 07/17/2010 at 2:23pm - misc - by knighton16 (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25713) - you deserved it (4447)
On 07/16/2010 at 3:38pm - misc - by apple (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)
Today, my wife changed her facebook status from "married" to "widowed". I'm scared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57426) - you deserved it (4262)
On 06/02/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I followed an acne treatment. It was only after I'd finished the treatment that I read the bottom line, stating "Do not scrub your face". I only had one pimple to start with, now it looks like I sandpapered my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4819) - you deserved it (17881)
On 03/13/2010 at 9:30pm - health - by Painfulfaceforme - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I realized that not only am I still an unpublished author, but I can't even get an FML posted after submitting several in the last year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25934) - you deserved it (5130)
On 03/13/2010 at 8:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Monday 20 May 2013
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