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Today, I realized that due to my obsession with House MD, I seem to have subconsciously developed a limp in my right leg. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5211) - you deserved it (16724)
On 04/03/2012 at 12:37pm - health - by spougeineye1 - United States (Washington)
Today, I had my first free night in months. I spent it doing homework and watching TV. I had set my Facebook status to say I was spending time with the boys from The Big Bang Theory, then fell asleep. I woke up later to an angry text from my boyfriend thinking I was cheating on him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16686) - you deserved it (3084)
On 04/01/2012 at 6:08am - love - by BigBangCheater (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18396) - you deserved it (1180)
On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)
Today, one of my nostrils became completely blocked. At lunch time, I went out to my car to dig into my nose. When I finished, I held up the cornflake sized booger in victory. I noticed too late that my boss was in a car adjacent to me, shooting me a horrified look. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7062) - you deserved it (16560)
On 03/28/2012 at 12:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14522) - you deserved it (2303)
On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States
Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21234) - you deserved it (1729)
On 03/25/2012 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I have been left home alone, the electricity has cut out, and I am petrified of the dark. I am stuck downstairs making karate noises every few minutes to scare off creepers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15713) - you deserved it (8125)
On 03/17/2012 at 8:45am - misc - by belieber101 - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, whilst stacking the dish washer I dropped a steak knife. Luckily, I caught it just before it hit my foot. I fist-pumped to celebrate my amazing catch and stabbed myself in the cheek. My parents couldn't stop laughing all the way to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8068) - you deserved it (21547)
On 03/14/2012 at 3:11pm - misc - by zztopspinner (man) - United States
Today, I decided to shave my balls. When I was finished, I vacuumed up the mess on the carpet, and then the fragments of hair still on my balls. Very bad idea. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6187) - you deserved it (37917) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture. In the mirror I could see a bra and thong sitting on his bed. They weren't mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29650) - you deserved it (2058)
On 03/01/2012 at 3:39pm - love - by eeelise5296 - United States (Arizona)
Today, an African-American family came into the restaurant at which I work. They said, "Jackson, party of 5." After I laughed, I realized they were serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13949) - you deserved it (20570)
On 02/26/2012 at 10:31am - work - by Miss_Kristen - United States (Missouri)
Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19539) - you deserved it (4297)
On 02/23/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by ZeroApostle4Ever - United States
Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12831) - you deserved it (24586)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18018) - you deserved it (4477)
On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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