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sisteresss

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sisteresss
  • Town/Country : Left Nostril, Nose
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2293
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 37 posted

About sisteresss : Twitter - @JuliaApplesauce
Instagram - @Twerkasaurus

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Today, I daringly tried that fish-bath thing, where all these fish come and eat all of your skin's dead cells. I got into it, and after 15 minutes of being a human buffet, at least 20 of the fish died. FML

#1305
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28731) - you deserved it (5405)

On 01/15/2009 at 8:25pm - health - by anx133 - China (Shanghai)

Today, while I was looking for a file on my boyfriend's hard drive, I came across photos of a half-naked woman wearing my clothes, but whose head wasn't really visible. When I demanded an explanation, I realised that it wasn't another girl - it was him. FML

#581
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25315) - you deserved it (2456)

On 12/23/2008 at 11:11pm - love - by Lililaloose - Sent from mobile version

Today, I need to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone has left work, I decide that, since I AM a jedi, my penis ought to be my Light saber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: “At least someone is having fun!” It was my boss. FML

#523
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5837) - you deserved it (20270)

On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version

Today, I get to see my boyfriend again after a month. So I decided to shave my pubic hair in the shape of a heart. After my little striptease, he gasped in admiration "Aaaw, Batman sign!" FML

#349
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22892) - you deserved it (10376)

On 11/20/2008 at 7:55am - love - by batgirl - Sent from mobile version

Today, for the 25th time, an Indian called my cell phone asking for 'Pinkie'. I don't know who the hell Pinkie is, but I don't appreciate people calling wrong numbers while I'm having it off. FML

#249
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27074) - you deserved it (8605)

On 11/07/2008 at 8:07pm - misc - by Hth - United States (Delaware)

Today, I’m starting my 28th year with 28 cents on my bank account. FML

#227
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39762) - you deserved it (10558)

On 11/06/2008 at 4:41am - money - by Yohm - Sent from mobile version

Today, it has been a year and a half since my boyfriend discovered online poker. Annoyed to see him spending every evening playing on his laptop, I threatened him: “Now honey, you have to choose. It’s your poker or me!” Answer: “You are bluffing!” FML

#34
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44175) - you deserved it (10214)

On 10/25/2008 at 12:54pm - love - by Anonymous -

Today, my 63-year-old neighbor jumped out of his window. I was the first to find him, alive, naked and stuck in a bush. I guess I shouldn't have laughed at him while waiting for the ambulance, because he was my landlord. FML

#24
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35583) - you deserved it (19671)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:32am - misc - by Benji -

Today, I lost my cell phone. But found it again! And then dropped it in the toilet. FML

#21
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39243) - you deserved it (18981)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:30am - money - by enjoy -

Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML

#20
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41637) - you deserved it (7155)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:29am - animals - by aXel -

Today, the bank I use lost 5 billion. FML

#19
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67977) - you deserved it (10043)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:29am - money - by Marco -

Today, during the trailers at the movies, my boyfriend elbowed me in the ribs and smiled when an ad for a weight loss institute was shown. FML

#18
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76347) - you deserved it (14618)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:28am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I woke up next to a beautiful, half-naked brunette in my bed. Two minutes later, my alarm clock woke me up for real. FML

#17
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61741) - you deserved it (17037)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:27am - love - by Jonathan -

Today, I got braces fitted. For the next two years, I'll be the most handsome guy on earth. FML

#12
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46196) - you deserved it (20530)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:23am - misc - by bym -

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

#8
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (266318) - you deserved it (23307)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:20am - misc - by mehdi -



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