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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25117) - you deserved it (6231)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:16pm - health - by -1 friend (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, my little brother gave me a candy bar for my birthday. After I ate the entire thing, he told me it was Ex-Lax and that I needed it because I'm "so full of shit". FML
I agree, your life sucks (28963) - you deserved it (4585)
On 05/17/2013 at 8:04am - misc - by Unlucky Individual - United States (California)
Today, at the supermarket, a man collapsed. I gave CPR while the cashier called for help. During this, the other patrons were complaining that no other register was open. Once the ambulance arrived, I returned to my cart to find items removed and 40 dollars taken from my purse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48793) - you deserved it (2510)
On 05/16/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34854) - you deserved it (1953)
On 05/15/2013 at 7:43pm - health - by LordCrafte (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I woke up without my fiancé in bed next to me, but I assumed he'd gone to work early. I went on Facebook to find that he had posted a break-up post to himself from my account and set my status to single. I then found a note with "Sorry" written on it stuck to the kitchen counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40374) - you deserved it (2310)
Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (71030) - you deserved it (3997)
On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)
Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43657) - you deserved it (2271)
On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38274) - you deserved it (4250)
On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the supermarket when an elderly lady asked if I'd grab some coffee for her from a high shelf. The moment I took my hands off my almost-full shopping cart, she made off with it. I ended up getting thrown out by security after she claimed I was trying to steal it from her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35386) - you deserved it (2394)
On 05/13/2013 at 3:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Swindon)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48556) - you deserved it (2621)
On 05/10/2013 at 6:58pm - health - by Chia (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was leaving my doctor's appointment when a nurse stopped me. She exclaimed, "Wow you are so skinny! What's your secret?" My secret? Having an autoimmune disease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43037) - you deserved it (2373)
On 05/08/2013 at 10:17am - health - by HamSandwich12 (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my dad called me a "deadbeat loser" after I came back from my first day of voluntary rehab for my meth problem. He's never had a job in his life and sits on the sofa all day, smoking weed and playing video games, all on my mom's salary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47629) - you deserved it (6701)
On 05/05/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was berated by a pharmacist, who said that kids these days are on so many unnecessary medications for "fake diseases". I was just trying to pick up the medication I've been prescribed to control my epilepsy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38043) - you deserved it (2214)
On 05/03/2013 at 4:52pm - health - by SSeizeTheDay (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was feeling down about being stuck in bed after ankle surgery. I thought I would go ahead and call my boss and let him know everything went well. He said the obligatory nice things, then told me that if I'm not at work on Monday, I'll be fired. I can't even get out of bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39964) - you deserved it (2486)
On 05/03/2013 at 1:35am - work - by clutzasaurus (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33991) - you deserved it (5233)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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